A Wise Girl
by Endless Raindrops
Summary: ON HIATUS Meet Sophie, a cold hearted girl with a colorful past and what seems like a dark future. Then one day she meets Seth Clearwater and her entire world and the way she thought about herself, and her place in it changes forever.
1. Prologue: What Seems Like the End

**Summary: Meet Sophie Sullivan, a cold hearted girl with a colorful past and what seems like a dark future. Then one day she meets Seth Clearwater and her entire world and the way she thought about herself, and her place in it changes forever. **

**This story is dedicated to jennyabc, IamKate, and Twilight0394. Thanks for reading my last story and reviewing when no one else would! (I still got over fifty reviews, but ya'll were the ones who reviewed the most, so I have to give you props.)**

_A wise girl kisses, but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left. – Marilyn Monroe_

Prologue: What Seems Like the End

The sandy colored wolf in front of me crouched down and snarled, showing all of his teeth, his entire being shielding my own.

I didn't think that it would end like this.

I'm pretty sure that Seth hadn't of planned it like this at all. I'm sure that in his mind I would be at home, safe, with Emily, Kim, and Nessie, and maybe even Sue. He and his pack would be taking care of this, and then he would come back home to me, where I would greet him with a hug and a kiss. Then we would go home and forget about it.

I wish today was going to end like that.

I was so glad that my life has gone down the road that it has, I wouldn't want it any other way. These past few months have been the closest to perfect that I think my life will ever get. I am thankful to him and what he has done for me.

I loved him, and was glad that I had a chance to tell him before all of this, and that I did. I wouldn't take anything that I did back, and was happy about. In my mind nothing would be changed for me, just for him.

I wish that he had imprinted on somebody else.

It wasn't him they wanted; no matter how badly he wanted it to be so. I was the reason that the vampires were before us.

_I_ am the reason they are here. _I _am the reason for all this mess, and when you make a mess, shouldn't you have to clean it up?

I have a feeling that if he knew what I was about to do, he would kill me, or want to. I don't think that he could ever kill me.

I hope he has it in his heart to forgive me.

"_Wait_!" I shouted, "It's me you want, and I'm right here."

**A/N: Yeah, so here's my new story. I have high hopes for this one, it's the best thing that I have ever written, if I do say so myself! :) Hope you like it half as much as I liked writing it!**


	2. Problems

Chapter One: Problems

God what was her problem? Does she have stare, and so blatantly too. It's like she doesn't even care that I'm looking right at her. I really want to flick her off, but the teacher is in the room. Damn. If only he would leave, then I would go over there and really give her a piece of my mind.

But who is she? I wonder, because there's no way that I've never noticed before. Oh, her name is Amy, Amy Adams. New girl, she's from Boise, Idaho, right? I don't really care, but if she is from Idaho I can make fun of her by saying that she's obviously eaten too many potatoes and her ass is starting to show it. (This would be a lie though, she's anything but fat, and she's a really pretty red head.) God, does she have issues or something?

Okay, I'll just ignore her.

This lasted for only a few minutes. I mean, honestly, it's just English, and who actually likes poetry and _literature_. No one, that's for sure. If anyone ever told Mr. Drownsberg that they liked his class they were obviously lying just to pass, because everyone knows that he gives better grades to t he people that he actually likes to the people who he despises.

Could this class get anymore boring? Isn't it bad enough that we have to read some guys poem (I mean, come on. He's dead.), that only talks about how depressed he is, can't we read something fun? Like how about something from this century.

I sighed and looked at my nails, remembering that I had already picked off my purple nail polish all of during second period science.

She seemed to be getting a low down on me from her neighbor over there, Chatty Christy, as I call her. She was probably telling her every single thing that she knew about me. Half of which weren't even halfway true, but I couldn't say anything about it. Or they might have been; it's amazing how much people knew about each other now.

As I looked at her I wondered which Sophie Sullivan she was getting. Was it the stuck up bitch Sophie? The total whore Sophie? Or was it the unbelievably cool Sophie, who you just have to meet. You know, the kind of person that all of those annoying people make up just to say that they are your best friend, especially when you so weren't (I'm pretty sure there weren't many kinds of those stories going around. I basically tell people when I dislike them).

Any way she got it, she was getting it the wrong way.

She would never really know the real me, and I was okay with that.

She wouldn't be able to handle it anyway.

I looked pointedly at Mr. Drownsberg (yes, that is his honest to God real name) hoping that she would get the message and listened to him for three more minutes (it felt like hours).

She was still staring. My God, couldn't she leave me alone already?

Okay, screw Mr. Drownsberg, this bitch really needs to revert her eyes to a more hospitable person in the room, because I don't care how new a person was. If you were annoying, you were annoying.

I lifted up my book to where the teacher couldn't see anything beside it, and gave her the bird.

She gasped and looked away. Well, she was asking for it. Not my fault that she was looking when she wasn't supposed to.

I giggled a little bit it was kind of funny if you think about it. I mean, really what did she expect, I mean she was the one who was being just a little bit freaky. I don't care how new you are to our school; if I think you're weird you're weird, and nothings really going to change that.

Thank the lord that all I have next is study hall, I mean, c'mon people, could this school day be anymore boring than it actually was, or maybe it was because I wanted it to be tomorrow already, since that would be the day that I saw Shane again. I highly doubt that it was the second one, but I had a feeling that it was the first one. I mean, how many days a week can you get bored and no get just a slight bit insane from all of the ennui?

I hate study hall; I had forgotten what a drag it could be in the past week of school that I had been absent form. This was the time of day that I wished that I had friends, my homework was done already, I did each subject's work in another subject (sometimes in that subject to pass the time) so that I could actually _do _something.

The reason that I didn't have friends wasn't because I was weird or anything like that (hey, even the kids who ate lunch in the restroom had friends at this school; each other) I looked normal, at least from the outside. I wore clothes just like every one else. They were all the current 'teen' name brands like Abercrombie and Fitch and American Eagle. It's not like I dressed in all black or anything. I don't talk weird or anything either. I talk like the average American teenager. I wear regular make-up; I don't do weird things with my make-up like some freak or anything.

Hell, I am the average American teenager at first glance. They can't really say that I'm weird, at least not by looking at me.

I mean, I used to have friends! I used to have a lot of them, but know I've pushed them all away when I came to public school and probably for the better, at least for them. They don't want to know me now.

Well, I might as well do something while I sat around and waited for this to end. I got out my purple nail polish and decided to re-paint my nails. It was the least I could do to let the stress through.

As I painted I looked at my other classmates, and I saw that familiar mane of red hair. I giggled again; it was kind of funny to have someone else scared of me. She was sitting next to Christy again (poor girl, the only reason Christy hung around anyone was to hear herself talk, I swear), and they were passing notes quite elaborately, I don't understand why they didn't just talk, half the time this teacher was asleep, and if he wasn't I swear he must be partially deaf. Once I had to shout at him three times to ask for a pass to the bathroom, and then he didn't even hear me right.

I rolled my eyes as the boy sitting next to me looked at me strangely, as if he had never heard anyone laugh or something.

"What are you looking at, jerk wad?" I asked him. There was no point in staring; it pisses me off how people can stare at someone for what seemed like forever, especially when you really didn't want them to stare at you.

"Nothing," he answered, "But you do have something on your face, if you really wanted to know," he added in an obvious attempt to save face.

"Is it my nose?" I asked. Honestly, how stupid could you get? I know that there was nothing on my face; I looked on my mirror that I have taped to my locker.

I checked at my reflection in my compact mirror to check this myself, this boy might be right, what did I know? I checked then was instantly annoyed with myself. Of course there was nothing on my face, since when was I insecure?

I snapped it shut. When would this end, honestly. Does it really have to be a requirement to have eight hours in a full school day?

At last the school bell rang and I got in my bug. I really liked this car, and was glad that my mother decided to give it to me after all; it saved me a walk, or even worse a ride on the school bus. I shuddered as I thought of it. Ugh, awful.

Then I felt a hand on my ass. I turned around, planning on giving this person a good punch in the face when I realized that it was just Shane. I turned my grimace into what I think was a very convincing smile. He was pretty sleazy, but good in bed so I dealt with him best I could.

"How was your day?" I asked him, making sure that my most winning smile was flashed at him. He wouldn't get lucky tonight, but he probably thought he was.

"Great, could have been better though, how about you?" he asked, as though he really cared. His breath was hot on my neck and was honestly feeling a little gross.

"Fine," I answered, trying to pull away from his hand that lingered on my thigh, but not exactly succeeding in getting away.

"You busy tonight?" He asked. God, could he be anymore obvious? There were people around for goodness's sake!

"Yes, actually I am. I'm planning on going to dinner with my mother," I lied. Okay, I didn't really have any plans with my mother in the near future, but at the word mother Shane recoiled a little bit. Good, he had no reason to be bothered by my mother, but if wanted to be I wasn't complaining.

"See you later then," and with another smirk and squeeze of my leg he was gone. Thank goodness he was a senior and I was a junior. I don't have any classes with him, especially since I'm planning on graduating early. He wasn't very smart, and I couldn't stand him for more than a few hours at a time.

As I drove up into my driveway I saw Mrs. Hexameter in my lawn with that maddening dog of hers. I hate the stupid son of a bitch. And her as well, she's always trying to get into me and my mother's business since my mother was the only single lady on the road with this large of a house. Sorry my mother's job pays well.

As soon as I stepped out of my car the dog started barking incessantly at me. I aimed a kick at it, but the stupid dachshund was too fast for me.

"Get your and your dog's ass out of my lawn! Haven't I already told you that our windows are now tinted?" I screamed over the barking of that blasted dog.

"Well_ excuse_ me!" she exclaimed over her dog. "And no, you did not," she added as an after thought.

"Well they are. You can't see anything through them. And if you don't shut this damn dog and give it some shock collars or something, whenever it keels over and dies, I'm not the one who put poison in its food."

"You wouldn't dare, I'll sue you!" She said, her face getting redder and redder by the second.

"With no proof? It's only me and you here, and how do you know I did it anyways? Everyone on this street hates the stupid thing anyway. I'm sure they wouldn't mind it being dead either."

"They do not; you're the only one who hates Mr. Pumpernickel!"

I laughed again. Okay, that was a straight up lie, but I wasn't about to burst her bubble. That dog was an annoyance to the whole neighborhood.

"Get off my property before I call the cops on you for being on private property! Now MOVE IT!!!" I shouted at her, as this woman got on my last nerve.

"Fine," she retorted and walked away, her nose in the air.

God, people piss me off.

**A/N: Ha, that last line makes me laugh. Please review! And I couldn't help but put this up, since my prologue only had four hundred and eighty-four words!**

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	3. Thinking of You

Chapter Two: Thinking of You

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! My alarm clock screamed at me. God, the stupid thing has to be the most annoying thing in the center of the earth. I grabbed the stupid thing and disconnected it from the wall and threw it across the wall. It hit the wall with a resounding thud. Oh damn, was the thing broken? I can't pay for another alarm clock right now.

I sat up and saw the mess that I had to clean up later. I had thrown that harder than I had thought. Oh well, it's Friday, I won't need one until Monday.

Ugh, I do not want to go to school today! My head is pounding, and I'm sore. I had another nightmare, and those always leave me more exhausted than when I went to sleep.

But I had to, it's something that the law says you have to do, and I can't go to jail, at least not right know.

I padded down the stairs after I did my make-up and looked to see if my mom was home. Her room was empty and she wasn't at the kitchen table.

Huh, she must be at her boyfriend's house. She didn't tell me that she was going though, which was weird, since she stayed at her boyfriend's for a week or two at a time.

Oh well. The least she could do is tell me though.

Oh, well she did leave me a note, how considerate is that?

_**Sophie, **_

_**I'm at Derek's.**_

_**I'll be here for a while.**_

_**Make sure you go to school this time; I don't want to get another phone call from the school asking me if you were sick again. Don't you think missing a whole week of school is a little extreme?**_

_**Call me if you need anything, and there's food in the fridge, I restocked it this week.**_

_**Oh, and there's a hundred dollars in the drawer with the silverware. **_

_**Love,**_

_**Mom**_

Okay that's good. She's not leaving me totally for dead like last time she was gone. Oh well, I'll just see her next week.

You know, she never brings Derek over to our place, she just goes over there. I wonder if he knows that she even has a kid. The last she dated didn't until they had been going out for about three months, and when he found out about me he bailed. That was pretty sorry of him, but I didn't mind much. From what my mom told me I wouldn't have liked him anyway. He sounded like such an ass; I have no idea why my mom even went out with him. I told here that I thought this, but she just blew me off; but she seemed to like him well enough, and it kept her out of my hair.

This guy seems okay, but I realized that I didn't really know that much about him. Mom didn't really talk that much when she was home last week, I realized when I was driving to school. Maybe she didn't want to talk to me, or maybe she wanted me out of her love life completely since I mucked things up so completely last time.

Well it's not like it was _my_ fault. I'm not the one who popped it out that I had a kid. _I'm_ not the one who forgot to mention that she was seventeen and almost out of the picture completely. God, couldn't she blame shit on herself for once?

At this lovely thought I arrived at school, and as soon as I pulled my key out of the ignition there was a person waiting outside my car window.

It was Tristan, and he evidently had been waiting for me. God, I am _so_ not in the mood right know. Can't he just leave me alone for about two seconds and get his own life? Has he ever heard of the words 'personal space'?

"What do you want?" I practically spit at him as I got out of the car. He had been standing so close to my vehicle that the door hit him, and I'm not about to apologize. It's his deal that he decided to stand so close to _my_ frickin car.

"Just to talk to you. _And _to tell you that I saw you cheating on me yesterday."

"Honestly Tristan! We are NOT going out. And we never will be, don't you get it?" Okay, know I was pissed. Didn't we have this exact same discussion last week? And the week before that, and the week before that, God this was getting old faster and faster.

I wouldn't take this from anyone else, but Tristan was rather good looking, with his grayish bluish eyes and golden brown hair. I gritted my teeth, frustrated as ever, ready to lash out at him full force when he said his next comment.

"But, Sophie. I love you, you know that."

Oh, not this again.

"No, Tristan, you don't. You just love having sex with me. There's a difference between love and lust. I know that, okay. Don't load this on me right know, okay. Please?" I asked him, my voice considerably softer than it had been just moments before. He couldn't believe this rubbish that he was in love with me to be truth, could he? No one could ever love me again, and I could never love again, that much I was sure of.

"No, I'm telling the truth. I mean, the sex is pretty great, but there's something else there, I'm sure you've felt it too, Sophie. Don't lie to me and tell me that you haven't! Don't lie to yourself!"

I snorted. Lie to myself. These days I constantly seem to do the opposite.

"Whatever, look, I'll just give you you're weekly blow job, and you can leave me alone, okay? You do want your head, don't you?" and with that I walked away from him. God, I was in no need of this now, right before school. It was going to be a bad enough day with out this mess.

Tristan started to say something, but I wasn't in the mood anymore.

Honestly, how could he think that he was in love with me, with _me_ of all people? I shuddered at the thought of him being in love with me. That wouldn't be good for him, or for me. I'm not generally the kind of person that you would take home to mom, and announce to the world that you're in love with me.

I couldn't imagine being in love again. If I hadn't felt it so profusely before I would be solidly convinced that there was no such thing as love in the world.

It was amazing what a bad experience could do to you. I thought about this during my first period class. Have you ever noticed that a bad experience could do more damage to the rest of your life than five good things?

One bad thing, like someone dying, someone breaking up with you, even when you end up hurting yourself you're life is so totally and completely different that you can't ignore the change.

You'll never see that person again, you'll never be able to kiss and love that person (unless you are in one of those annoying off again on again couples) ever again, and most of the time, even if the injury is minor that part of you will always hurt, always have a scar or some kind of blemish on that area, or even not be able to do certain things that you love anymore simply because of that.

But happy things can change the least things of you're life. Like being kissed, going somewhere special, doing something. The only thing that can change your life so completely that is happy is falling in love, but everyone knows that even that can be painful at time.

To me it seems like everything can be.

"Miss Sullivan! Do I have to scream at you! I've been asking you this same question for the past five minutes, and you have yet to reply. What is the answer?" Miss Orpheus asked.

"Um, China," I answered, having been paying no attention to her at all and therefore not hearing the question.

"Wrong, the correct answer is the Treaty of Ghent, which, as you all _should_ know was the treaty that stopped the War of 1812, even though to us there is no clear victor in the war, and anyone who doesn't know that should write a two thousand word essay on the war and the treaty, dating each battle and stating your sources. Anyway, as I was saying, in the end America…"

Okay, I was angry at that bitch and was thinking some, let's say _unkind_ thoughts about her before she even told me that but now this? That would take my whole weekend, and she wasn't like most of the teachers here, and she wouldn't forget no matter how badly I hoped for her to.

God, that means that I wouldn't be able to see Tristan tomorrow unless I stayed up really early on Saturday night.

Damn it! What's the deal with that?

**A/N: Okay, Sophie lives in Hoquiam, Washington, not Forks. Hoquiam is the place that the Cullens lived whenever they found out about the wolves and met Ephraim Black, so I imagine that it's pretty near La Push. It's a pretty big town, about 11,000 people or so. This will become important, and I don't want ya'll to think that she lives in Forks, okay? I just needed to clear that up. Oh, and please review! It means a lot to me when you do.**

**Love, **

**Dicey**


	4. That's Got To Be Impossible

Chapter Three: That's Got to Be Impossible

My side hurts like a bitch and Tristan has yet to show up, but he's never late so this is really weird for him, at least to me. This is the _last_ time that I'm meeting him at the library. (I know that's what I said. Who would have ever known that _Tristan Lockhart_ of all people would even know where the library is, let alone work there.)

He has thirty minutes until his shift starts.

I sigh a bit obnoxiously for being in a library and check my watch again. Yep, he's officially fifteen minutes late in nine seconds. Eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. Okay, he's _extremely_ late.

Why can't he just be here so we can just do it and leave? I need to get back and finish that damn paper that witch of a teacher assigned me on the Treaty of Ghent. Well, since I _am _at one of the biggest libraries in town I could look for books on the War of 1812 while I was here.

I looked for books for another twenty minutes, forgetting that I was even waiting for Tristan. I found a few books that would be helpful, and a few books that just looked good, so just incase I had time to read them I would.

The library really was one of my favorite places to go, not that I go much because they just remind me of… I shook my head just to get rid of the images already nearly filling my head. There was no way I was going to think of that voluntarily.

Then I hear Tristan laugh as he was coming in, almost thirty minutes laugh and I feel my nostrils flare. How could he laugh when I've been waiting here for almost an hour? Then I cooled myself down, admitting that my being angry honestly being fair and that I needed to chill before I said anything, because we were, after all, in a library of all places. They don't take kindly to people shouting, I found that out from experience in the eighth grade. Angry librarians can be quite scary, if you really thought about it.

I walk straight up to him, about to demand an excuse, but then I stopped short. He's with another girl.

The girl is really rather cute, with her short brown hair and light brown eyes. She was shorter than me, and a bit on the plump side, but that seemed to add, rather than detract from her beauty. She has a long nose, and glasses that are hanging from the end of it, making her look like a reprimanding, chic (admittedly) teacher.

"Who are you?" I asked, rather rudely I admit.

"Oh, hey Sophie. Um, this is Maris, Maris, this is Sophie," Tristan says nervously. Oh, he's scared that I'll bitch at him in front of her.

"Glad to meet you," Maris chirps brightly, and holds out her hand.

"Right back at you," I retort, but I don't look at her. I'm far too busy looking at Tristan, trying to figure out what's going on. Are we, or aren't we? I need to know so that I can leave this ice cream stand or not. "Um, Tristan, can I talk to you for a second. Alone," I say, looking pointedly at Tristan. This really wasn't what I had in mind at all.

"Sure," he says nervously, as he steps out from behind Maris and comes to face me.

"Um, are we going to or not?" I ask, refusing to elaborate anymore. If I told him how angry I was because of his being late, I would start to shout, and as I already said, I'm terrified of angry librarians.

He pauses for a second to think, and then he takes a deep breath, "No, Sophie, I don't really think that this thing is going to work out anymore, I mean you do cheat on me, and besides Maris is really nice. I really like her."

"Okay, Tristan, how can I tell you this gently? Hmm… well I'm not going to tell you gently, I'm going to tell you the straight up truth. WE. WERE. NEVER. GOING. OUT. EXLAMATION. POINT**.**" God, how many times must we go through this? Christ Jesus, didn't I tell him this yesterday?

Come to think of it, yes I did. What a little shit head, how could he not remember.

"Yeah, well I really like Maris." He said, totally shrugging off what I told him for what felt like the millionth time. "What do you think about her?" he asked me, his face looking so earnest, that I almost felt bad for him, he must really, really like this girl.

"She seems really sweet," and for once when I was saying something nice, I wasn't just lying with a sugar coated covering. This time, I was for real. Wow, I was even surprising myself.

"Really you think so?" he asked, and I nodded. He grinned like a little kid on Christmas. "Aw, thanks, you're the best," and he kissed me on the cheek and was gone.

Really, that's how he just walked out of my life just like that. He didn't look back.

Was I really so easy to leave? Was I not withstanding enough that you could just leave me without a single glance and never look back. What about all of his proclamations of love?

Then I laughed ironically at myself. Did I really believe that? Did I honestly think that for one second that what he said was true? I must have, because otherwise I wouldn't be feeling this way. I wanted to cry, but then straightened out my shoulders and walked out. Screw both of them, I wasn't about to go back there now.

I strutted down the street, rather fast, my mind in a jumble. What was my reaction back there saying? Was I getting soft again?

As I made my way past an expensive looking BMW I kicked it, my heels and all. Its siren went off and as I walked by I laughed maniacally. Nope, I still had it.

Just slow down, I told myself. Breathe quickly and quietly, in and out, come on now, you can do it.

I stop in front of a store and stop outside. I pull out the credit card that my mom gave me for 'emergencies only' but this is a serious emergency. Shopping makes me feel better, or maybe it's just spending my mom's money, I'm not really sure which one, but either way is fine with me.

I stop in front of a store that is obviously trying to be cute, because its name is _Boutique _and it has a fake pink poodle in the window. How very… un-cute.

Anyway, they have really nice dresses here, and I don't know what I might need one for, but I might so I might as well ring it up. They're fairly priced here too, only $1,029 for the cheapest one! Oh yeah, let's buy the whole store!

I laugh at my own joke and the lady looks at me like I'm crazy. Well, it's not my fault her face looks like that!

As I picked out a blue dress with a fitted bodice and a poufy skirt, I turn to run into someone behind me. It was a tall guy; I mean he had to have been 6'6" or 6'7" at the shortest. He was rather good looking, with black hair and eyes, and had one of the biggest smiles that I had ever seen on anyone.

Oh, he must be here with girlfriend then. I mean, why else would he be in a store like this. Oh, well he might be gay; I mean who else would smile like that?

But when I looked behind him there was no one behind except for the twelve year old girl that was in here before even me.

"Um, will you move?" I asked him and he moved out of my way so fluidly for such a big guy that I looked back twice.

"Yeah sure, "he answered, and smiled at me again. Okay, I was totally certain that he was gay at this point, I mean come on. He was in a girl's store with a huge smile on his face, and he looked very male from this angle. He wasn't wearing a dress or anything, so I knew that he wasn't a drag queen.

I was about to ask him if he was gay, but he spoke first. "Can you help me look for something for my sister?" he asked me, totally throwing me off. Okay, well that was kind of weird.

"Sure," I told him, looking him in the eye for the first time. They were extremely warm, and the second that I did that it felt as if our souls divided from our bodies and met in the air in front of us. The feeling was so strong that I tumbled backwards a little bit and hit a rack, almost sending it flying across the store until that guy caught it.

Okay, what the hell was that? Did I get that feeling every time I meet total and complete strangers?

No that, couldn't be it that just doesn't happen to normal people. Well, I never said I was all that normal either. "Sorry," I mumbled to him and walked out the door. He watched me go with bewildered eyes.

Okay, I had to figure out what that was in there, because if I didn't it was going to be bothering me all day. That didn't even happen with Peter the first time I met him a very long time ago.

I was crossing the street when I heard someone shout "_NO!_" rather loudly. I turned to see who it was, I mean, it's not like I was doing anything offensive, I was just crossing the street when I suddenly saw the bus in front of me that was hurdling towards me in what seemed like lightning speed.

**A/N: Haha! Cliff hanger! I'm not going to say anything except please review!**


	5. Explanation or Not

Chapter Four: Explanation or Not

As the bus flew towards me I suddenly felt a weight on me and flew to the ground with such threatening speed that I didn't see anything clearly, and had no idea who the hell was on top of me. It was really frightening, and I just shut my eyes and tried to drown out the roaring that was in my ears, as well as the sound of all the incoming traffic.

"Are you okay?" the person on top of me asked.

I nodded, noticing that my head throbbed as I did so, and I was rather closer to the gravel of the street than I ever wanted to be again.

"Can you get off me?" I asked, suddenly wanting this person to get off of me as my thoughts became more and more coherent.

"Sure," the voice answered, and I soon realized that I recognized that voice. It was a guy from that dress store, _Boutique_ or whatever it was called.

Then all the reasons why I had even left that store to begin with came flooding back to me, and I felt a slight coloring in my cheeks, something that I hadn't felt in a long time.

I felt his weight suddenly lift off me and I got up on my own, ignoring his helpful hand.

"What is your name?" I asked him, suddenly wanting to know more about him. Whenever I looked into his eyes, and I felt that feeling again, but I didn't feel as overwhelmed as I did the first time, or maybe that was just because I was standing in front of a busy street and didn't want to fall into the street again, having the feeling that if I was going to fall into the street a second time that I wouldn't be quite so lucky.

"Seth, Seth Clearwater," and with that I fainted dead away.

~*~*~

When I woke up I was in somebody else's house. Their ceiling was white and smooth and they had a ceiling fan going at top speed.

"…good thing that you were a nurse mom. I don't know what I would have done without you here at the house."

"You're welcome, but you can't just go off saving people from hurdling vehicles and expect them to be okay with that, I mean, if you were a human what would you do if some random person that you hadn't known for more than three seconds at the most had saved your life?"

"Probably the same thing she did."

"Exactly, give her mind some time to recover; it was a lot for her to handle right now."

I heard him, Seth, sigh, and then his feet shuffle. Did this guy really save me from a moving bus?

I mean come on; there was no way that a normal human being had saved me from a speeding bus.

But that woman in there had said, '_if you were human_,' after all. Was it possible that this Seth person wasn't just a plain old regular human after all? What if he was more?

But he wasn't a vampire, I could tell that much right off the bat. For one thing he wasn't pale enough, and he didn't have that unnatural beauty about him that, from what I had seen, all vampires had about them. And when he was on top of me, I remember, he wasn't cold. In fact, it was quite the opposite. He was actually quite warm, like warmer than regular people.

His eyes also weren't the regular burgundy or black really. His eyes were slightly lighter than a thirsty vampire's.

But what else could be fast enough to save me from a bus going at least sixty miles per hour from the corner of a sidewalk?

But _come on_, wasn't the world insane enough without adding some kind of other magical creature to the mix. I mean, I now Washington wasn't exactly a small state, but didn't it have to have at least one mythical creature inside its boundaries.

What kind of world was this? Obviously a world where some kind of inhuman beings roam around saving or hurting regular people who will never know a thing about them, or will eventually know something about them that they really didn't want to know.

But then there were the people like me who were either too smart for their own good (not me, not really) and as soon as they met one of these things figured out what they were exactly, or close enough, or got thrown into their world without wanting to be, and never being left out (so obviously me).

I wondered what this Seth person was, and if there were others like him.

As I got up I had a head rush and swayed a little bit from side to side. "Whoa," I said out loud.

"Are you alright?" Seth asked me suddenly by my side. That's weird; I didn't even notice him in the room before.

"Yes, I'm fine." I paused and looked throughout the unfamiliar, but seemingly attractive room. "May I ask where I am?" I asked. I was in a room with white walls and wood trim. I had just been on the couch, which was a dark green color, and there was a fold out chair in a sandy color. It was quaint, and I didn't see a television set anywhere.

"Of course, you're at my house."

His house? "What?! Where the fuck's my car? And my keys? And CRAP! I have to go home and finish my paper that's due on Monday! I know mom's not home but I have to get there know!" I looked on the wall at the clock. "OHMYFUCK!!! It's ten fifteen! How long have I been out for?" I asked again, looking around and found my jacket and my keys, which means that my car is here. Good, I needed to be home as soon as possible.

All the while, as he watched the growing alarm on my face Seth started to laugh. I exploded on his ass. I don't care if this is his house or what, I was leaving anyway. "And what right do you think you have to take my car and drive it anywhere without my consent, you bastard! I can call the cops on you, do you realize that? And what was with you going to that store anyway? Are you fucking gay or something? Where's your boyfriend huh?" I asked him, getting louder and faster with every syllable.

His grin froze in place, and I smiled in satisfaction. Good, this non human freak needed this.

"Well, it sounds like somebody is awake," a woman's voice says from the doorway. She's shorter than my five foot eleven frame but she looked a heck of a lot tougher than I was. She had long silver and eyes that looked about as old and wise as the world. "I'm Sue Clearwater, and this is my son Seth, as you probably already know. You just got over a large surprise, I'm sure, but isn't there anything that you would like to tell my son?" she asked me. I stared at her in disbelief, but she nodded, prodding me into being polite. I liked this woman more by the second; she obviously knew how to put someone in their proper place.

"Thank you," I told Seth, turning back towards him. "For everything, from saving my life to bringing me here."

"You're welcome, it was no problem," I stared at him in disbelief. What did he mean, no problem, and he said it so nonchalantly, like it was nothing! He was acting like he went around and did this for people all the time, like he was superman or something.

Maybe he was.

This was getting weirder all the time.

"Um, I think I'm going to go know, it was nice meeting you both," I said backing out the other doorway.

"Not so fast, wouldn't you like an explanation, from Seth at least? And besides, you have no idea where you're going, or where you are, wouldn't you like Seth to come with you, and take you to your house? He could always just take the bus back or something." Sue gave Seth a long knowing look, and Seth nodded slowly.

"Yes, that would be best," he agreed.

"Okay?" I said, making it sound more like a question and I numbly followed Seth out to my car. Today was such an odd day, and I wasn't acting like myself at all.

We traveled along in silence until we got to Hoquiam and then he started talking.

"So I guess you want an explanation, don't you?" he asked me.

I thought about that for a little bit but then shook my head. No, that was the last thing that I wanted right now anyway. All I really wanted was to go home, work on my homework and then go to bed and forget that today ever even happen. I didn't want any explanations or anything of the sort. I just wanted my mom and to forget that there was no supernatural things anywhere.

My eyes almost welled up with tears for the first time in a long time and I guess my expression must have been something to see because I saw Seth look at me in alarm. "You're not going to have a breakdown are you?" he asked me, his eyes suddenly very worried.

"No, Seth, I'm fine." I told him with a sigh, "Turn left whenever you get to the intersection on Turner Road." Seth nodded again and didn't say anything, for which I was grateful. I'm not exactly in the mood for talking.

When we got to my house I sighed deeply in relief. I was finally home. I for sure wasn't going to even wash off my make-up. I was just going to go to bed ASAP.

"Well, are you sure that you don't you want any kind of explanation or anything?" he asked me, looking more alarmed than he had before.

"No not really," I said, suddenly feeling more fatigued than ever. "Goodbye," I told him, thinking that would be the last time I would ever see him.

If only I knew how wrong I would be.


	6. My Immortal

Chapter Five: My Immortal

I was in the forest near Hoquiam again. It was twilight, and the sun was just about to set. But then I saw them, the group of vampires that were either about to kill me or my beloved. I had seen this in so many different ways but this seemed so unlike all of the others. I didn't want to have to deal with this, so I turned around. Maybe they weren't looking for me this time.

This time Seth Clearwater was there, and I felt this need to protect him, even more badly than I wanted to myself or Peter.

Oh, Peter.

I saw him in his full glory, his golden hair buzzed short and he was wearing torn jeans and a blue t-shirt, the last outfit that I had ever seen him in.

He was so beautiful that I wanted to cry.

I start to run towards him. _Oh Peter! I've missed you so much. _I was about to say, but I couldn't, something wasn't letting me.

Peter shook his head at me and smiled gently. He nodded towards Seth and then was gone.

I turned to Seth and he was fading into thin air as well, the alarm on his face the worst thing that I had ever seen on a human beings face. He looked behind me, and then at me. He tried to reach out towards me, but then he was gone too.

I turned slowly behind me, staring into the bright blood red eyes that were looking deeply into mine. I opened my mouth and tried to scream. He didn't let me do anything though, his razor sharp teeth were already in my throat, and I could feel the venom already starting to rush into my blood system burning me whole…

I woke up covered in sweat and my heart beating frantically. I started to shake in my bed and got up and walked down the main stairway and went down to the kitchen for a bottle of my favorite red Gatorade. I peeked in my mom's room, which was empty. Hmm... she must still be at Derek's.

I looked at the large digital clock on the wall. It was 3:54 and there was no way in hell I was going back to sleep, not back to the hell that was my dreams.

At least it was a Monday morning; I wouldn't have all day to spend thinking about my dream.

My heart rate slowed down eventually and I was able to taste the Gatorade that I was drinking. Yum, artificial sugary goodness is the right thing for anyone that is currently about to suffer from heart failure.

I leaned my head back against the recliner that I was sitting on and closed my eyes. I just want to think about this, something that I've been avoiding ever since he died.

Why can't the ghost of him just leave me alone? I don't want any of these haunting memories; I don't even want him any more.

He haunts me.

But it would kill me to lose him now.

As much as I wanted to forget him, I wouldn't, I couldn't. I couldn't stand not being able to see his face, even if it's just in my dreams.

I remember the day I met him like it was yesterday.

~*~*~

It was starting to drizzle, and the feeling in the air was like a feeling of anticipation, since it was probably just about to storm. I was nodding to whatever beat was in my head at the moment, feeling totally oblivious to the world. My day had been absolutely perfect; well perfect for the fourteen year old me anyway.

Caleb Andrews had talked to me at school about the pizza, something for which I was absolutely ecstatic. I had been crushing on him since the second grade, and now, finally, in the ninth grade we were just getting into the 'talking' stage. I was floating on a cloud, in other words.

I had just gone to my friend Leslie's house and was going to wait in front of the local coffee shop so that my mom could pick me up, since it was a school night and I couldn't stay over, a fact that Leslie and her mother had been fighting about, which was why I had been walking by myself, after Leslie's mother had apologized profusely.

My mom was just a tad bit late like she was for everything, so I wasn't worried. I just sat up on the bench and looked up at the sky, wondering what it would be like to be looking at the stars with my head on Caleb's chest. At the time I thought that would be the best thing in the effing world.

I sighed loudly in bliss just thinking about my (!) head on Caleb Andrews' (!) chest, receiving looks from several people passing by; I got strange looks even back then.

I noticed several people going into a dark alley way and looked away, thinking that they were probably going in there to get a quick high from some kind of illegal drug and leaving it at that, probably not wanting to know what else they were planning on doing in that dark secluded place by themselves.

I heard the sound of shuffling papers, and then a slight scream that sounded like it was cut off before it could get much volume.

I turned and looked, but there weren't any immediate signs of anything happening, but I wanted to be sure. I got up slowly, hoping maybe that my mom would come and I would have an excuse _not_ to go look and very possibly help, but there wasn't anything that I could do because I had to go home with my mother. She was a no show.

The alleyway was even darker and creepier than I would have thought and there were three figures in there instead of the two that I had seen going into the place, which is probably what all of the fuss is about. I'll just go.

But then I saw the man on the ground. He looked sickly pale, as if all of his coloring had just got taken out of his body, and there was a faint… well to be honest it looked like a bite mark on his neck. This was too weird, and I honestly went too far in there for it to be good for me. I slowly backed out, trying not to make any noise when the other figure turned around.

He had the girl's neck up to his mouth and I had a feeling that she was dead as well. He looked at me, but as soon as he met my eyes I felt strangely unafraid of this person. Then it started to pour.

Even though it was even darker than before, I still noticed that his eyes were an un-human bright red and for some reason he stopped and stared at me, dropping the girl to his side and looked into my eyes searchingly. I backed slowly up, not wanting this… thing (for surely he was not human) to harm me. I was just planning on backing up and forgetting this ever happened when he spoke.

"Wait," he told me and his voice was the most beautiful thing that I had ever heard in my life. "Don't, don't be frightened please."

But how could I be any less than repulsed, horrified, and terrified? He had just killed two obviously innocent people that were laying on the ground right in front of me that's only wrong towards him was that they just happened to be in the wrong place in the wrong time.

But once again I wasn't. Even though his eyes drew a feeling of alarm through me each time I looked at him, I still felt strangely drawn to him, and that was enough for me. At that point in my life I was one to follow my heart and I did.

"What's your name?" I asked him.

~*~*~

And he didn't kill me. We talked for what felt like hours, and my mother ended up not coming to pick me up, and so he gave me a ride on his back (honestly that was so exhilarating, better than any thrill ride I've been on before or since), and when I finally went home she was passed out on the floor with her friend Brenda with a bottle of vodka in each of their hands, but for once I didn't mind.

He told me that he was a vampire that night, something that I had basically figured out before he told me. He drank human blood, and killed people, but I still fell in love with him. Love is a truly strange thing.

I looked back at the clock and the clock proclaimed that the time was 6:45. I don't think that I am going to school today, I still need to finish that stupid ass paper for that bitch and I honestly don't think that I can handle the people that are in my classes today.

I got up and went to get dressed in my sweats and carefully put Peter in the back of my mind, not allowing myself to fast forward into any events that happened a bit more recently.

I can't believe that I haven't seen his face in four years, that fact just shatters me.

I got in my car and drove somewhere without thinking about where I was going and I ended up at my favorite place in the world; the skating rink in town.

My skating rink is about as old as my mother, and is practically a dink compared to some of the newer ones in Seattle that I've been to, but none in my opinion were better than the one here in town that is probably only half a mile across and around.

I smile to myself serenely as I realize that even my subconscious would lead me here as I was upset as anything.

"Hey Sophie, are you coming to skate today?" Jan asked me, the director of the rink. He was at one time a famous Olympic skater; he had made it on the team and everything, until he got into a car accident and hurt his knee. He had to have surgery and intense physical therapy before he could even walk again, but he continued to love skating so he opened up this skating rink, something for which I am extremely grateful for.

I smile at him and nod, and he lets me in without paying, since I come practically all the time whenever I need to clear my head, and besides, I've made out with the kid who handles the money exchanges. He basically lets me in free because whenever he does, I make out with him again. Needless to say I don't have to pay much t get in.

Ice skating is what got me through that awful year after Peter. It clears my mind and burns calories, which is always a plus. Sometimes it's really hard not to fall, and whenever you do the ice is cold and hard, just like life. But you can always get back up, very unlike life. I enjoy it; I do it as often as my life allows me, which is a lot.

I hear a giggle and turn to see a little blonde headed girl with a huge grin talking to Jan. He must be having a lesson right know, and I glide off the ice.

"Sophie," Jan calls, "would you mind warming little Mindy up?" and he goes and continues talking to who I suppose is Mindy's mother.

"Sure," I call, not really surprised that he's making me work with the little girls that take lessons at his rink, he's done it before, but not for very long.

"Okay," I tell Mindy, grinning at her. After all, her parents are paying Jan and the least that I could do is be polite, "What does Jan usually have you do to warm up?" It varies, depending on how old the person that the lesson is being given to. I can't really tell by looking at someone, so I have to ask.

"We usually stretch and do a warm up lap," she told me shyly and doesn't meet my eyes.

I nod, not really surprised. "Let's start." I bent over and touched my toes and she mimicked me. We continued to stretch, and then we warmed up with a lap. Mindy seemed to warm up toward me and she smiled at me a few times before Jan came up.

"Thank you," he told me, and I glided away slowly. I didn't exactly want get off the ice, but I know that I had to. I went by Mindy's brunette mother and started to take off my skates.

As I flexed my toes the woman turned to me. "Um, excuse me. I don't mean to bother you, but I was wondering, are you by any chance Taylor Swift, or at least related to her."

I worked very hard trying not to roll my eyes. Okay, I did roll my eyes, but I couldn't help it, this happens to me all the time.

"No," I answered, "not at all. I don't even know her. Sorry," I told the woman, and I smiled at her, but I'm sure it looked like a grimace. I'm not used to being polite to people, to be honest.

Just because we have the same wavy blonde hair, and the same shaped and colored blue eyes people automatically assume that I am the famous country singer. But if they looked closer they would see that that fact was not true at all. Even though our mouths are the basically the same shape, my mouth was wider on my face, maybe just a little too wide for my chin. And my chin was squarer than hers as well.

Also, I am not talented at the guitar, and I cannot sing. At all. My singing voice would probably kill a rock, even though it was technically not alive, it was that bad.

As I got up I decide to leave. I really needed to start on that paper and it was lunch time. I was hungry.

When I turned around I ran into a rather large person.

"We just keep running into each other," Seth said with a grin.

Fuck.


	7. Second Chances

Chapter Six: Second Chances

I looked up at the giant of a man and rolled my eyes. "Doesn't that sound the least bit cliché to you?" I asked him, raising my eyebrow. How had he found out where I was? Was he a stalker or something? Because a stalker was the last thing in the world I needed right know…

"No, I'm not a stalker," he told me and I stared at him. How did he know that is what I had been thinking about? This was really getting kind of weird, and not in a good way.

"How did you know that I was thinking that?" I asked him and stood by my car about to open the door and speed away as fast as my car would take me. This was getting far too weird for words.

"Because it's written all over your face, and, to be honest, that's what I would be thinking about right know if I was you." I stared hard up at this grinning man. I wasn't used to very many people being this much taller than me. I mean, I'm five eleven in my bare feet; few people were more than half a foot taller than me, like Seth was.

"How tall are you," I blurted out randomly. He made me kind of nervous, and when I'm nervous (which almost _never_ happens) I tend to point out random things and talk. A lot. It's not pretty.

"I'm six eight, actually. Jealous?" he asked and he wiggled his eyebrows. I had to stifle back a laugh; OK this kid was way, way weird.

"No, not really, I don't think that a six eight girl would be deemed attractive, do you?" I retorted. Seth really was extremely cute and his grin looked as if it was about to split his face in half. It hurt my face muscles looking at his grin.

"Depends on who the girl was, if truth be told," he told me, and I got butterflies in my stomach from the way he was looking at me.

Whoa. Where the hell did that come from?

I cracked a grin at him, and looked around the parking lot, trying to find a different resting spot for my eyes, as I suddenly found myself feeling shy. Me, Sophie Suzanne Sullivan shy? Never.

The parking lot was empty except for my car and Jan's, and a large SUV that probably belonged to little Mindy's family. "Where's your car?" I asked again, getting back into my nervous habit.

"I took the bus," he answered, and a look of humor passed on his face, but it left just as quickly.

Oh. "Well do you want to go some where; I mean it does look like it's going to rain and all?" I asked, trying to act casual. SOPHIE! What is your issue; you don't go and ask random people to go with you some where? What if he's some kind of crazy serial killer and he's decided that you were is next victim? You're going to get yourself killed!

But I was just trying to talk myself out of this. Somewhere, deep in my core I felt a kind of trust with him that I had never felt with anyone else before. To be perfectly honest this feeling scared me a little.

"I mean, you don't have to…" I tried to continue, but he stopped me.

"Sure I'd love to," Seth went around to the shotgun side of my car and waited patiently for me to unlock the door. I grudgingly pushed the button and got in. About five minutes after we were already on the road, he turns to me and asks, "Um, where exactly are we going?" which was a wakeup call for me, I was already turning home, having no idea where on earth to go with this man who looked rather uncomfortable squished up in my car.

"Here," I told him, and pulled into a little coffee shop that had a great chocolate scone that was only two or three blocks from my house. I don't think that wretched paper is going to be finished anytime soon.

"You like coffee?" he asked me and he wrinkled up his nose at the thought.

"No," I laughed at his expression, "they just have awesome scones here."

"Scones?" he asked.

Honestly, who doesn't know what a scone is? "It's like a cookie," I start to explain, but then he starts to laugh and my words falter.

"Just kidding, I mean, who doesn't know what a scone is?" What a jerk move. That kind of pisses me off, but then he started to talk so that I got distracted again. This guy makes it really hard to get mad at him.

"I used to love coffee, but one time I and my friend Collin had a contest about who could stay up the longest, and we drank plenty of coffee-and coke, but that's not the point- and we drank so much that just looking at coffee makes us sick."

"Who won?" I asked him.

"I did, by three minutes, my sister Leah timed us, and all while calling us both crazy while she got a full twelve hours of sleep while she slept with our time clocks."

"Smart girl," I said and went straight up to the counter, "A chocolate scone, and," I looked in Seth's direction.

"Whatever you're having," he said.

"Make those two chocolate scones please." I told the girl behind the counter and handed her a ten.

"Yeah, me Collin and Brady are pretty tight, even though they're a year or so younger than me, they're pretty cool."

Sounds like fun, I think to myself. It makes me almost want to meet them. "Yeah they seem pretty cool, but what on earth made you desire to stay up for probably over twelve hours?"

"I don't know, we were bored and Brady was sick… so one thing led to another and now we both can't stand the site of coffee plain and simple."

"Yuck, that sounds so gross. Now _I_ probably won't be able to look at coffee just thinking about it."

Our scones came to the table and that stopped all of the talking for a minute. As I bit into the scone the melted chocolate of a chocolate chip slowly dissolved into my mouth and I couldn't breathe. These things are so good.

The expression on Seth's face made me laugh as I saw his eyes get wide as he took his first bite. He looked like he was in heaven. That is exactly how I felt when I first came in here with Leslie in the seventh grade.

"Dude, I totally have to get the recipe for these things so that my mom can make them," he said.

I shook my head "They won't give it to you; I've asked probably over a million times. I've even offered to pay off the chef."

Seth was the kind of person that made you happy all of the time if he was happy, or even if he wasn't in high spirits he would still try to make you happy. I haven't smiled this much in years, my face was actually sore from all of the talking and smiling that I had been doing.

I was really starting to like him, something that these days, is really rare, especially when a person can talk.

I'm really not a people person, at all.

Seth laughed, "That won't stop me," and went up to the counter only to have the girl with the heaviest eyeliner that I have ever seen on a single person before, shake her head and smile apologetically. She mouthed something to him that I couldn't understand since I'm not a lip reader (anymore) and he smiled back and said something to make her laugh.

Then he sat back down and grimaced. "Yeah, you're pretty much right. They wouldn't give it to me, and that girl said that they probably never would. They said that Chef Perry would die before sharing his secret recipe with _anyone_. He didn't even tell his family she said."

"And you would know this how?" I asked him.

"Well aside from the fact that she told me that she was his daughter… I basically just guessed."

"Oh," well that one shut me up. Do people just randomly tell him things like that? He does make people feel really comfortable…

I looked at my watch. Crap! It's 4:15. I still have to go finish my paper on the oh so important War of 1812 and I have to go make sure that my mom's not at home. I don't think that my mother is going to be happy that I skipped school (again, for the third time this semester no less). She might stay home for over a month like she did last semester. Crap.

"Look, Seth, it was really good talking to you, but I have to go. Preferably now," I got up too fast and the table went with me.

"Oh shit, sorry. Look, I really have to go. I have something important to go do."

"But…" Seth told me. I waved and gave him an apologetic look and mouthed the words _I'm sorry_.

The sad thing was I really meant it.

**A/N: Look, I know that this chapter may seem kind of pointless, and it kind of is, but I wanted to explain some things and I wanted Seth and Sophie to have a better meeting, where Sophie is actually starting to let her guard down a little bit. She has this whole façade thing going on, which is finally starting to break down. **

**Oh, and I apologize for the sparse updates lately! I feel awful about them, but I couldn't do anything with my computer gone. I've written a one-shot (it's a Renesmee/Jacob story) in apology, and it's dedicated to anyone who reviews on this chapter, and all the people who read this story and waited so long for the fifth chapter. It will be up soon, no later than a week!**

**Sorry, this is really long! **


	8. There

Chapter Seven: There

The sad thing was that my mother wasn't even home. I totally ditched Seth for no good reason.

I sighed and clicked on my computer.

_The War of 1812 started in the year 1812..._

God, I was going to fail this, but I didn't care. I started stating random obvious facts, such as it was against Great Britain.

It took all of thirty minutes.

But when the phone rang, I ran to get it, for some insane reason feeling a kind of fragile hope, but when I heard the sound of the tired voice of my high school principle on the phone that hope was crushed. 

"Hello, is this the lady of the house?" his nasally voice asked. God, I was so glad that I didn't have to look at him every day, for once being glad that our school was so large, seeing as all of Hoquiam sent their 'darlings' to Theodore Roosevelt High School.

"Yes," I answered. Besides, it's not like he's ever going to hear the difference anyway, and I'm pretty sure that my mom and I sound almost identical on the phone, or so I've heard.

"Are you aware that your daughter did not attend school today?" he asked, sounding bored. I wondered randomly how often he did this to people.

"Yes, actually. She was rather sick this morning when she woke up. I was going to call, but then I caught up at work and I forgot. You know how these things go, am I right?" I asked him, trying to keep my voice light.

"No. But you do realize that this is the third of her absences this semester, they sixth for this entire year, and the second this month."

"Why yes I do, actually. Sophie's always been a sickly little thing, and most of those days were doctor's appointments and retched sick days. But I must admit, the time earlier this month I took her to the mall to give her the day off. Even kids need a day off, don't you think?"

"Yes, but if she gets any more absences she may not be able to graduate early, as she has planned."

"Oh, my," I heard the front door open. "Excuse me sir, but my dinner is burning I have to go," I said and I hung up.

"Hey Sophie, are you here?" I heard my mother's voice call as she hung up her coat in the hall closet.

"Yes mom, I'm in the office, doing homework!"

"Oh, well what do you want for supper? I'm kind of in the mood for Pizza, but anything would be good for right now."

Wow, she must really be in a good mood. She almost never compromises when it comes to Italian food. She's addicted to that stuff. "Just make sure that the pizza has artichokes please!"

"Sophie, you know Derek wants to meet you." Really? What a surprise. Hmm… I've heard his name before, and the name seems kind of familiar. I shook that feeling off. The name was fairly popular; it's not like the name Tunisia or anything.

"OK," she called back, and she stuck her head in the door. "Oh honey, I missed you. Were you okay without me?"

Oh _honestly_. Was she smoking something? "Yes mom, I was fine," I called back, giving her a smile. I've been fine since I was fifteen when you started leaving me for weeks at a time, I grumbled to myself.

~*~*~

As I drove to school I found myself hoping that Seth would be there and that I wouldn't have to go to school. Then I laughed at myself for acting like a stupid idiot girl. I barely knew him.

When I turned to my parking spot I saw Shane waiting for me. What was with people and waiting for me before school? If I wanted to talk to them I would seek them out myself. They don't need to wait for me; they could at least talk to me in the hallway. Isn't that what normal people do?

"What the hell do you want?" I asked him, folding my arms over my chest.

"Why weren't you at school yesterday?" he asked, answering a question with a question. Asshole.

"I had a personal day, and a paper to finish. What's it to you?" I asked. God, can't he and Tristan leave me alone? Tristan at least was taken care of, but Shane is still very much here. I should know better than to have fuck buddies at your own school; that's what colleges and private schools were for.

"You know why it's important to me. How else are we supposed to get together?" he asked me.

Just say it Sophie. Tell him that you never want to fuck him again and the he needs to leave you the hell alone before you go ape shit on his ass.

The bell rang, saving me from my indecision.

"We'll talk about this later," Shane told me, and gave me a wink that made me want to gag. I mean, come on. Gross.

I nodded numbly and went to go turn in my paper that I spent all weekend worrying about. I'd better get an 'A' is all I know.

As I dazed through the school day, Tristan gave me the occasional nod in the hallway, which surprised me. I didn't think that he would want to even look at me ever again, let alone be polite, now that he has Maris. That was nice.

When the school day was officially over (thank the gods for annoying school bells) I walked out to my car to see Seth sitting on the hood.

"How did you find me here?" I asked him straight up, no beating around the bush, I really was going to figure this guy out. He seemed to always come back to me, no matter how rude I am to him, like the first time I spoke to him, or even last night. Normal guys don't seem to do that.

"Well, I knew you lived in Hoquiam, I drove you home, remember," he told me when I raised an eyebrow at him, "and you looked like you were in high school, so I decided to start at the public one first when I saw your car. It's very recognizable you know."

I nodded. "Well get your ass off my car. I hope there's not a dent, or else you're paying for it to be taken off."

He leaped off obligingly. "Why hello, who are you?" I heard an obnoxious voice say. Oh my God, _Shane_.

"Shane, go suck a dick and die, okay?" I told him without taking my eyes off of Seth. He didn't seem to be angry, but there was a worried look in his eyes when ever he looked at Shane. I almost laughed; did Seth think that Shane Thompson would be able to beat him up? Shane is only an inch taller than me, and has some muscle tone, but not nearly as much as Seth.

"Well, you'd be the expert on doing that, wouldn't you?" he asked me tauntingly and I turned around. When he said it made everything that I did with him and the tons of other guys feel dirty. It made me feel shame about it for the first time.

"No, but you would, with your boyfriend, am I right?" I asked him, giving him a basilisk's glare. Was he seriously making suggestive jokes in front of Seth? Oh my God, go piss off.

"I'm pretty sure that you'd know more about that than me. I mean, how many 'boyfriends' have you had?" he asked me, putting figurative quotation marks around the world boyfriends. I never wanted to punch someone more in my life.

"Go away you ugly ass douche bag, or else I'll tell everyone how big your dick really is," I threatened.

"Come on Seth, let's go," I told him, and without two words he got in, crunching uncomfortably in the little driver's seat again. I flicked Shane off as we drove away. God, what an ass wipe.

As I looked at Seth he just stared straight at the road. "What?" he asked me, "Do I have something on my face?"

"No, I told him." God, I hope that he didn't get any of the sexual innuendos or any of the hints that Shane had less than subtly said. I should have known that he wasn't that big of an idiot.

"So, what was that Shane guy's problem?" he asked me, "He seemed like a real ass."

"Well he is, and maybe I'll tell you, if we ever become better friends." Hah, fat chance with that one. There was no way that Seth was ever going to find out about me and my virginity-less body. For some reason that I couldn't fathom, I had no desire for Seth to think badly about me, ever.

"Me, you, and the words better friends. That sounds like a really good idea. I like it," Seth told me with a grin.

"So…" I asked him after about five minutes of an empty silence. At least he didn't have to talk all the time. "What do you want to do?" I asked. "I have no homework, and my mom's probably not coming home 'till about nine. I have time, and you obviously have time, I mean, you are here, after all."

"Yes, I have time," he told me with a grin.

"Anything in particular that you want to do?" I asked him.

"Yes, I want to go home," he told me.

"Um, okay, just drop me off I guess, but make sure to leave the car at my house. You can find a bus, can't you?" I asked. That was random.

"No silly, I'll take you with me. I want you to meet my mother."

**A/N: That probably seems really unlikely, but Sophie **_**is**_** his imprint, and technically she's already met Sue, so I think it's very appropriate. Oh, and I apologize for the cussing in this chapter, but Sophie was in a really bad mood, and it was necessary. Please review!**


	9. Home to Mother

Chapter Eight: Home to Mother

Holy crap. I'm not exactly the type of girl that you want to bring home to mom, Seth, I felt like telling him. But I couldn't exactly tell him _that_ without starting a whole new round of questions.

"Okay…" I told him, not exactly being sure what to tell him. What do you tell a guy that you've known about for exactly a week who wants to take you home to go meet his mother, and possibly his father? I have no earthly idea, that's what.

"Am I going to meet your dad too, or is that saved for tomorrow night?" I asked him nervously. Please, dear God, don't tell me I'm going to meet the _parents._ I've barley known him for a week.

"No, my dad died quite a few years ago, actually," he told me his voice suddenly growing somber. I felt really bad for him, I mean, I know what it's like to not have a dad, but I couldn't imagine having one and then having him taken away from me.

"Oh, I'm sorry," suddenly hoping that I hadn't offended him in the slightest. That's not exactly what I wanted to do.

"It's okay," he told me reassuringly. "I mean, how were you supposed to know? It's not like I exactly have a sign around my head that says 'fatherless son' or anything like that. It's all cool."

It was silent for a second, but then I turned to ask him another question.

"So why do you want me to meet your mom?" I asked him, truly curious. As far as normal guys were concerned, the less you knew about their family, the better. And that's the way it was on my side of things with Seth. There was no way that I was going to tell him that my mother leaves me alone more often than not.

There was a lot about myself that I wanted to keep hidden with him.

"I don't know. I have this weird precognition that you two would get along really well. I think you and my sister Leah would too, actually."

Oh wow, he had a sister. "So where does Leah live?" I asked him.

"Well, right know she goes to Washington State, so she's currently in Seattle. She's studying to be a teacher, actually. But she comes home for the holidays and stuff. She's not too fond of home, but it's not our mom or anything. She just has other issues," I could tell that he probably wasn't going to say anything more on the subject, and that was fine with me. It sounded highly personal, and I was never one to pry.

"So what's she like, your mother?" I asked again, for some insane reason I was feeling highly nervous about meeting her. The last time that we had met wasn't exactly under the best of circumstances and I was really rude. I really need to work on that. It was no wonder that no one liked me. But I had used my rudeness for so long as a shield that it was really hard to let go of, especially at a point where I could be counted on being vulnerable. I wasn't quite used to it yet, but I have to resolve to let it go at some point, especially now that I had Seth, and he had friends. Really cool friends from the sound of it and I wanted them to like me.

"She's really tough, she's been through a lot these past years, and she has a really big heart, so don't let her shell intimidate you. She loves doing that to people sometimes, but she probably won't do that to you, so I wouldn't worry about that. But she also has this way of looking into people. It's strange, but strangely right, and I'm sad to say that neither I nor my sister got that particular talent."

She sounded like a really awesome mom, and all of the respect that I had felt on Saturday came back.

"Well we're here, what do you think?" he asked me. This was the first time (second, if you thought about it technically) that I had seen the outside of his house. It was small and quaint. The panels of wood on the outside were painted yellow, and it was outlined in a white scalloped trim. On the whole it was extremely cute. I adored it immediately.

"It's so _cute_," I squealed, very uncharacteristically but it really was, and Seth chuckled at my expression.

"I guess," he replied, and he gestured his way to the front door. "Ladies first," he told me, opening the door. I gulped, and stepped inside.

The house was very warm, with the same décor as before. But that was a silly thought. It's not like their living room was going to change the second time I was in. There were two hallways leading out of the living room, which seemed to be the main room of the house.

"Mom," Seth called, his voice lingering around the house.

"In the kitchen," was the muffled reply I heard from the second hallway.

"Come on," Seth told me, and grabbed my hand. I recoiled from the sudden contact, and pulled my hand from his before he could get a good grip. I couldn't see his face, and suddenly had a wave of guilt pass over me for a reason that was foreign to me.

This scared me. I used the hand that Seth had grabbed to nervously brush through my behaving hair, trying to soften the blow, even though Seth couldn't see.

"Hey Seth, I was just thinking about you. And who's this?" Seth's mother added as soon as she noticed me behind Seth.

"This is Sophie, the girl who I brought home the other day, remember?" he asked.

"Oh yes, I remember. The rude one, who couldn't say thank you properly," she told me with a harsh look. Seth looked like he was about to object, when I intervened. I wasn't going to be rude, but I couldn't exactly say that what she had said didn't hurt, something that also surprised me.

"Yep that's me. My mom sometimes calls me that too," I said. For some reason Seth's mom smiled.

"Okay. I like you," she told me simply, and Seth's face relaxed considerably. "You can call me Sue, by the way. Everyone else does."

"Okay Sue," I answered, the name feeling alien on my tongue.

She smiled at me again. "Would you like a cookie?" she asked, and I nodded numbly in reply. The cookie that she gave me was double chocolate chip (I love chocolate), and it was quite soft. Sue was a good cook.

"Seth told me about the muffin that you introduced him to, and so I decided to try my hand at it. They're not exactly muffins, but I had to give it a shot, and my muffins never turn out right, so I figured a cookie is the way to go. I mean, who doesn't like a cookie?"

"Freaks of nature," I mumbled, being a smart aleck.

"Exactly," she agreed, and handed Seth two more. He had already eaten five by the time that I had finished my one. It was amazing; he inhaled them like a vacuum. I stared at him.

"What?" he asked, starting to feel self-conscious.

"How many cookies have you eaten?" I asked him.

"I dunno, about seven I guess," he answered, looking confused.

I just looked at him. "I've never seen someone consume as much food as you that fast, ever."

He shrugged. "You should see Jacob. He can eat ever more than I can. Or maybe even Paul. Mom, who do you think eats more, Jacob or Paul?" he asked his mother.

"Probably Paul. Remember that one time I made three cakes for all of you, but Paul ate two of them?" Sue reminisced, smiling as she did so.

I wanted to meet these people, and soon. They all seemed like such a family, and I wanted to join as much as possible. This feeling left me feeling staggered. I had never felt anything like this… longing. It made me, well not uncomfortable, but… different. I can't explain it.

"So are all you guy's family or something?" I asked while grabbing another cookie. Sue really was an excellent cook. She gave the coffee place's muffins a run for their money.

Sue and Seth exchanged a brief look that I didn't miss before Seth answered my question. "Yes, something a bit like that." And then he changed the subject.

"So are you free tomorrow?" Seth asked me.

I nodded. I was always free.

"Good, bring her over here again, Seth," Sue said as she ran the water for the dirty dishes. I felt useless, so I went to go help, grabbing a dishtowel that was on the oven.

I nodded more eagerly.

I like Sue, and I wanted her to like me as well. And I also wanted to see Seth again. We just felt so natural here, the two of us.

We weren't awkward with each other anymore, I realized as he drove me home. We had an effortless conversation on the way home, and that was more than I had felt for anyone in a very long time.


	10. My Life Would Suck Without You Now

Chapter Nine: My Life Would Suck Without You Now

The next few weeks were amazing. I had the most fun that I had ever had with anyone in a very, very long time. Sue became like a second mother to me. Seth was my best friend, and I blurted that out to him as soon as I had thought of it.

"Seth," I stated. I had no idea what

"Hmm?" he asked me. We were sitting at my table at home working on a thousand piece puzzle like old people at a nursing home because Sue had a doctor's appointment in Port Angeles and I didn't want to go over to Sue's by ourselves. He was working on his second corner and was trying to find the middle piece.

"You're my best friend, you know that right?" I blurted unthinkingly, and then I was suddenly embarrassed. How could I tell him that? I hadn't told him everything (how could I, he would think that I was absolutely nuts and send me to a home), but he was the person that I spent the most time with. And I think about him constantly, especially at school. I always wonder what it would be like if he went to my school. I would have more fun, certainly.

"Are you serious?" he asked me, a grin slowly making its way across his face.

"Like your BFFL or just your BFF?" he asked, making his voice unnaturally high.

I couldn't help it. I beamed. "Both," I told him.

"Okay, good, just making sure that we're on the same page here. Because just to let you know, your mine too."

I smiled again. "Awesome," I told him as I handed him the piece I figured he was looking for. I didn't know. They all looked the same to me, and besides this was _his_ idea, not mine.

Sometimes Seth left Sue and me alone, not very often, but whenever he did, it was for a very long time, and I usually didn't get to see him before he came home.

I asked him once where he went and he answered me very vaguely. "I had to go to work," he told me, and there was a look in his eyes that told me that he wasn't going to say anything more.

I worked on Sue once, thinking that she of all people would tell me, but her answer was just a vague. "He's at work," she told me while we were chopping up the vegetables that were going to be Sue's and mine supper, seeing as I eat with them all the time whenever my mom's not home.

"Oh," I said, "What does he do, exactly?" I asked, poorly concealing the curiosity in my voice.

"Can you hand me the thyme that is in the cupboard right above your head?" she asked me before she answered. "He works in… security I guess you could say."

"For what?" I asked. I was growing frustrated. Why couldn't they just answer the damn question already?

"For La Push," she answered as she stirred. "Now, will you go outside and hand me some potatoes please. We don't have any inside the house."

It was getting strange… but I wasn't looking that much into it. I was sure that he would tell me eventually. And if he didn't tell, Sue probably would too.

I mean, how much could be hidden in La Push, a tiny Indian reservation on the coast of Washington? Nothing too big, considering the fact that there are only 900 people living here now.

I asked him once what happened that day he saved me from that bus.

"Easy, I saved you, and when you passed out I took you to mom. You know, she was once a nurse."

"Really?" I asked, distracted. But that wasn't the point. "Look Seth, I mean when you saved me. How did you get there so fast? That's what _I'm_ worried about here. I don't really care right now that your mom was once a nurse, no matter how cool that is."

"You think it's cool that my mom was a nurse? That's kind of weird."

"That is not the issue here _Seth_! Stop trying to play me off. I'm not fucking stupid. Now; _WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?_" Honestly I was getting frustrated. I was not getting lied to, especially not by him.

"I had an adrenaline rush, okay? There's no need to yell Sophie."

Yes there was, actually. Whenever I Googled it (because that's what you do whenever you don't know what something that somebody important tells you.) it didn't say anything about being able to move fast, and everything. It doesn't make sense, but oh well.

For some reason, I didn't believe him fully, even though I was sure that he hasn't lied to me. I get feelings about people when they lie, but I was pretty sure he didn't lie to me. There was just something he wasn't telling me…

My mother only asked about where I was all of the time, and I answered her infrequently. Seth got aggravated at me for that, in the beginning anyway. But once I explained to him everything and after a while he changed his mind.

"How do you live with your mother like that? You barley get to see her, and when you do, it isn't for more that a day or two? I couldn't live without my mother for a week."

Neither could I (about his mom, not my own), but I wasn't about to tell him that.

"AW! Mama's boy, aren't we? But yeah, I don't know if she ever really wanted me anyway. It isn't that big of a deal. It wasn't always like this, but it has been for the past five or six years, and I'm okay with it now."

"Oh," was all he said and he turned away.

"My mom got pregnant with me in high school and she and my dad were in love, right? Well once she figured out that she was pregnant with me, she told him, which was a smart move. I mean, you don't tell teenage boys stuff like that ever. They can't deal with it. Anyway, he booked it once she started to show, after promising that he'd stay with her through everything. I think she kind of blames me for that, but I can't be sure.

"So yeah, if by some off chance she sees you and starts to talk about using protection, don't mind her, okay? It's not like it's the first time that I've had a guy over before. She gives them all the same talk, so don't feel like special."

"Wait… whoa, okay back up here. You've had other guys here?" he asked, his hands put up into defense mode in front of his chest.

It surprised me how hard it was to answer his question about the matter. Well harder than anyone else anyways.

"Yes," I told him, ashamed. I wasn't going to lie to him.

"Have you slept with a guy before?" he asked. Damn! Why did he have to keep asking all of these questions?

"Yes," I told him with a fake laugh, "I mean it's not like I'm in the first grade anymore. I mean you've had to have slept with a girl by know. I mean, you're like nineteen aren't you?" I asked him hoping seriously that he was going to say yes. I didn't want to be the only one.

"Eighteen and three quarters, thank you very much. Anyway, no I haven't actually. I'm saving it for marriage."

Oh. That's so… sweet. How odd that I think that now of all times, especially since I didn't wait…

But the only reason that I even started doing all that stuff was because of Peter. (God, its amazing how much it still hurts to think his name, even though it hurts considerably less now that I have Seth here with me. Instead of a razor blade all I feel is an unpleasant throbbing). After he died I needed to fine some way to cope or else I would have gone partially insane. I found another guy named Tony who was really sweet to me, and I thought he really liked me. I didn't love him, (far from it actually) but I still cared about him. I wanted _him_ to like me, anyways. So I got close to him, and then BAM! He asked me to have sex with him, and I agreed. I don't remember much about it, except for the fact that it hurt a lot, and I cried. But other than that, nothing, I probably mentally blocked it.

I'm so glad that I found Seth, or better yet he found me. I don't know what I would do without him. In the past few years he is the most decent guy that I have met. He really is my best friend, and if I had met him even when I was with Peter I still would have tried at least to be his friend. I do wonder why he spends all his time on me when he could easily have a girlfriend. I asked him about it once, but he didn't say much.

"I think you're really cool too," was all that he said.

"But don't you have a girlfriend or something?" I asked, pressing him. There was no way that a guy like him was single.

"No, I don't really like anyone right now, actually." I was astonished that this hurt me as much as it seemed to.

"What about you," he asked, "don't you have a boyfriend?"

I laughed with a mirthless laugh. "No, actually. Maybe I'll tell you why later, but not tonight, okay?" And I would. Soon.

I hoped.

**A/N: The part about Sue being a nurse actually is true, look it up on Stephenie Meyer's website. And yes, I did get that line from the **_**Twilight**_** movie. :) I didn't Google adrenaline rush either, if you can tell. I didn't have time. And I'm sorry that this felt like a filler chapter. I mean, it kind of was, but I really need this story to speed up in time, I feel like it's going by so **_**slow**_**. And no, Seth wasn't lying when he said he didn't like anyone. He knows in his own weird imprinter way that all Sophie really needs right now is a friend. Anyway just thought I'd clear that up and, please review!**

**Love,**

**Dicey **

**P.S. Go read my new story out, it's called _Breathe_ I know about .21% of you care, but I like it, and I would like your thoughts on it! It's Jacob and Renesmee! Once again, please review!**


	11. Change

Chapter Ten: Change

"This is going to be our last batch, okay Sophie?" Sue told me as we stirred chocolate chips into batter. This woman cooks constantly, and not even for herself most of the time. It's really amazing. She says sometimes she cooks for Emily Young, a girl on the reservation.

"Who's Emily Young again?" I asked.

"She a girl on the reservation, I already told you that," Sue told me.

"I got that part, I mean, why are we making these for her. We've had to of made twelve dozen or so at the very least, I mean my arm feels like it's coming off I've been mixing so much!"

"Well, you know how much Seth eats?" she asked me.

"Well yeah," It's kind of hard not to notice. I mean, he eats like a starved person even though he's far from it.

"Well she has a fiancée who eats exactly like that, who stays over at her house a lot, plus she has others to cook for, like her husband's friends and such."

"And they all eat like Seth?"

"Right. Sometimes, they eat more."

Oh my god. How could anyone eat more than Seth? I gaped at her and she smiled at me. "And they all work in security I guess," I told her. What do these men do all day when they work? Do they just run around the entire perimeter of the state of Washington or something?

But I know better than to ask Sue, or Seth. They wouldn't answer me fully and I'd just get frustrated.

"Can you finish this batch, I need to get off my feet, and I'm feeling extraordinarily tired today for some reason."

"I wonder why, it couldn't be because we've stood here all day and done nothing but create culinary masterpieces all day could it?" I asked her with a grin. "Yes I can finish it without anything going wrong, I hope."

As Sue went to lie down I wondered what could be wrong with her. It just seemed so out of character for her to actually _want_ to lie down. She was normally so tough! She had been going to the doctor's office a lot…

"Sue, how old are you?" I asked her, hoping I wasn't being rude. Ever since Seth and I became friends I had become fractionally nicer to people. I was hardly ever rude, but I still got aggravated sometimes. I couldn't be perfect, and besides, that façade was the thing that I hid behind for so long, I couldn't just break the habits now.

"Twenty nine and holding," she told me. I laughed and then she added seriously "I'm fifty three, why did you ask?" She told me.

"I just wanted to make sure that you weren't going to die on me or something," and then I internally sighed with relief. That was still really young for people.

"No I'm not going to die! My goodness, why are you being so morbid all of a sudden?" she asked me.

I shrugged in answer and finished putting the cookie in the oven where they were going to cook for fifteen minutes. I sighed. Maybe I could rest before we had to clean up.

I knew the real reason that I was worrying, but it wasn't exactly something that I could say out loud, even if Sue knew everything.

The anniversary of Peter's death was coming up in a month, and I was getting depressed again. It was hard to think about, but the date was right around the corner. And I was insanely worried about Seth, even though there was no reason to be. I mean, it's not as if they would have any reason to mess with him anyway…

As I shook my head to get it out of my funk Seth walked in the door, and I smiled at him the best I could.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, looking worried. This was one of the worst things about Seth, he noticed too much sometimes.

I nodded and tried to smile more convincingly. It didn't seem to work, but I didn't want Seth to be worried about me. "Do you want a cookie?" I asked him. He usually forgot everything once we brought up food.

"No," he answered. "I'm not very hungry, actually."

"You're not hungry?" I asked. Wow, that had to be a first.

"Nope, I just ate at Emily's with the guys, we needed our fuel."

Oh, so that's what Sue meant when she said Emily needed help.

"Look, do you want to go take a walk down First Beach?" he asked me suddenly, almost randomly.

"Um, sure I guess. Let me go get a coat and I'll go talk to Sue really fast," I answered almost as swiftly as he had asked the question.

"Oh yeah, where is mom anyway?" he asked me.

"Up in her room."

"Okay, I'll be waiting out in my car. I don't think that your car could handle the sand."

I rolled my eyes; he always made fun of my car! When I entered Sue's room she was dead asleep and I didn't want to wake her up for something so insignificant.

"She's asleep, I didn't want to wake her up," I told him and he nodded.

Seth's house was on the other side of the reservation, the one farthest from the beach, so it took a while. We didn't talk in the car like we usually did, and this worried me a little. We usually didn't have silences like this one. What was on his mind! I needed to know before he drove me insane.

"What's your problem?" I finally exploded on him. I winced at my words, they sounded harsher than I had intended.

He grinned at my reaction, but to me it wasn't funny. I glared at him as his grin faded, and he didn't look me in the eye.

This scared me for more than one reason. What if he said that he didn't want to be my friend anymore? What if he was sick and tired of me coming around, what if he asked me never to talk to him again? There were so many things that could be going wrong in a situation like ours, and I was frightened to my core. It would kill me again if he said that he didn't want me to be his friend anymore.

"Okay, where did that come from?" Seth asked me. I shrugged. I wanted Seth to go on, I wanted this to be over as quickly as possible so that I could go home and try to forget about him. Try being the main word here.

I didn't know if I could do it.

Seth took my hand, and this time I didn't shy away from the contact. For some reason it felt oddly comforting to me. Like I had been in agony, and his touch had taken the pain away.

Okay WHAT THE HELL was that? I had an urge to pull my hand away from his and run away as fast as I could in the other direction. That sensation scared the hell out of me I had never felt that before in my life. Ever.

"You know," Seth started as he glanced at our hands so quickly I almost didn't notice it. "My birthday is in two weeks."

"No way, how old are you turning?" I asked him. That meant that his birthday was about a month or so away from mine! How cool is that?

"Nineteen. Duh Sophie, I've already told you that!" Oh, right. I had forgotten.

"So when is the actual date?" I asked, liking the way that our conversation was going. Maybe things weren't going to be as dreadful as I thought.

"November twenty seventh, actually," he told me with a wink. "I'm having a party, which is part of the reason that you and mom made those cookies."

"Really? Why didn't she tell me that then?"

"She probably didn't realize that I didn't tell you that. I usually tell you almost everything."

The almost bothered me more than it should. What was with the almost, I mean I didn't exactly tell him everything myself, but still.

"Oh, so am I finally going to meet the infamous Collin and Brady?"

"Yeah, you'll meet all of the guys."

"Will Leah be there, or is she going to be in class then?" I asked. I wanted to meet Leah, to see if she'd approve of me. I knew it really didn't matter in the slightest what she decided about this, I mean, Sue liked me well enough and I guess in Seth's opinion (from what he's said before) she was the one that really mattered.

Not to say that Seth didn't care about his sister, because he did. I could tell by the way that he would talk about her, and the gleam he got in his eye made me all the more eager to meet her. She seemed really important to him.

"No, Leah won't be there. It's difficult for her to be here, is all."

I nodded. I never understood what Seth or his mother meant whenever they said things like that about Leah. I wondered randomly if it was a family trait to be vague with one another. But then again, they all knew what the other one was talking about. I was the only one who wasn't in the know.

Seth took a deep breath and I braced my self. Here it comes, the blow I had been waiting for, and I could see it plainly on his face.

"Look, Sophie, there's something I need to talk to you about. I probably should have told you about it earlier, like way earlier than this, but I was scared. Please just take this rationally please."

Oh God. What could be the worst that could happen? Did he have a girlfriend or something now, and he was afraid that I would take away from that relationship? It's not like I'd never heard that one before.

Oh my god, that was so true! How could I not see the truth that was right under my nose! The elongated work visits, the vagueness? I might as well have been blind.

But then the pain that I felt after realizing my assessment blew me away. I then knew why I didn't see this coming. Because I didn't _want_ to see it. Why should I be sad if he had a girlfriend? That fact really shouldn't have hurt me as much as it did. Images of Seth kissing a girl with long dark hair filled my mind and I wanted to shy away from the pain. This _hurt_.

No, no, no, no, no. I didn't _want_ to find this out. The phrase 'ignorance is bliss' has never been so true. I had to fight the urge to cover my ears and hum obnoxiously.

"I didn't want to do this right know, but mom suggested it would be a good idea and I agree. As I told you before, I should have told you a very, very long time ago."

He took a deep breath again and I bit my lip. The suspense was killing me. Why couldn't he just tell me about it already, damn it!

I want to die at home now please. I just wanted to mourn what could have been a great friendship.

"Look, don't go off screaming, please. Please. But the truth is that I'm a werewolf."


	12. Explanation or Not Part II

Chapter Eleven: Explanation or Not Part II

"Whoa, okay. Back the hell up and repeat. What did you just say?" I asked. There was no way. There was just no fucking way he just said that with a straight face. Okay, cue the laughing and 'I was just kidding Sophie, you should have seen your faces'.

This just had to be a joke. There just was no way.

"I. Am. A. Werewolf." Seth told me, speaking slowly and clearly as if that would make me understand better. It didn't help much.

How could this even be _possible_? Wasn't one mythical creature enough for one person? Did I really need to know there are even more dangerous things out there in the world besides vampires? I mean, really, werewolves?

"What do you mean werewolf?" I asked him suddenly feeling slightly woozy as the world turned round and round. I didn't have this strong of a reaction when Peter told me he was a vampire, so what exactly was the problem now?

It was probably because at the time I had honestly expected Peter to be different. I mean, the man had glowing red eyes that you would never see on a human being, not even from contacts. But Seth was supposed to be normal, for Christ's sake!

I should have known that he was different. I mean that day with the bus… no semi normal person was that fast, ever, adrenaline rush or not. Only a vampire… or a werewolf, obviously. This was utterly insane. My life is utterly insane. Maybe I'm going _mentally_ insane.

And he was so huge! I mean, I've seen big people, but he was a monster. I'd never really noticed before this moment how truly tall he was. He had to at least be six foot eight, on the short side. And he was so warm, but I'd also never noticed that before either, always keeping out of touching distance from him. But still! A werewolf!

I drew my hand away from his to rub my temple.

There was nothing wrong with this situation, but nothing right either. How in the world could this be? And why didn't Peter tell me about this? I mean, obviously werewolves were part of the supernatural world as well, unless he didn't know about them. But how could a vampire not know about werewolves, especially ones that live so near, only thirty minutes from Hoquiam, and an hour and a half from Seattle, two of the many places that he had lived.

"How?" I asked, utterly speechless. This was craziness in its greatest form. I was still trying to grasp it, but it was hard. But I believed Seth completely. I mean why would he tell me something that wasn't true? He wouldn't do that to me.

But was he mental? How else would think that he actually turned into a wolf?

"I don't know," he told me. "We've almost always been that way. It has always been part of our culture." He told me. "Just listen."

And then he began to tell me stories of spirit warriors, cunning and ambition, and spirit warriors becoming part wolf and part human.

"Then there are stories of the cold ones," he told me. As soon as he told me cold ones, I knew exactly what he was talking about. What else could he be talking about that had ice cold skin and was beautiful? I swear if he told me that witches were real I was going to scream.

"Vampires," I whispered. This was still so surreal.

"Wait, what?" he asked me.

"Your cold ones. They're vampires, aren't they?" I asked him, barely paying attention to the alarm in his eyes. This was just too strange for me to notice anything other than trying to figure this out. There was no other explanation for this. There was magic in this world. Pure, undiluted magic.

How amazing. And all these years I believed that evolution was real, and that vampirism evolved as well.

How wrong I was.

"Wait, how do you know about vampires?" Seth asked me. Shit. I wasn't planning on telling him this. There were a lot of things that were not going as planned today.

"Well, you were in the middle of telling me a long story, weren't you? So you finish telling your big story, and I'll tell mine after your finished, okay?" Seth nodded slowly, keeping his eyes on my face the whole time.

"Well anyway, then there are stories about cold ones. They're vampires, like you said before. We're basically made to fight them. That is the reason that we exist, Sophie, because they do. Otherwise I'd probably be a normal boy with nothing better to do than stay at home. But I'm different, fortunately. The whole wolf thing is actually really cool. I love it," he told me with a grin.

"But there is another thing that we do, and it's just another weird werewolf thing. You know, what I'm about to tell you is the scariest part of this whole mess. I've imprinted. On you."

I frowned at the unfamiliar word. "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, and Seth laughed at my tone of voice, even though I was totally serious.

"Well, I don't know if I can explain it properly. I've seen imprinting happen loads of times, and it's only happened to me once. It will only happen to me once, actually."

I nodded once to keep him going. There was no way in hell that I was going to let him stop talking now.

"We have this bond with each other, I guess you could say. We're basically meant to be together is the short way to put it. We're soul mates, each others other half."

Of all the things that Seth had said this afternoon, this had to be the hardest to wrap my head around. Soul mates? Since when?

"When did this happen?" I asked, barely able to keep my voice from shaking. This was too much, far too much for just one person.

"The first time I saw you," he told me bluntly. Wow, love at first sight. Wait, love? When did that come into the equation?

"Like, love at first sight?" I asked.

"Not really. It's more absolute. More like gravity moves, once you see her, and in this case 'her' would be you, you're all that really matters to the person who just imprinted."

"So basically, what you're saying is the fact that you are a werewolf forced you to be in love with me?" I asked, trying to comprehend. Nothing of what he was saying made sense, and yet all it did _was_ make sense. Monsters must be more attracted to me than I thought.

"No, love grows for werewolves, imprinted or not, just like everyone else. But the only thing different about us is that you're stuck with me forever. I'm not like any regular old dog. Whenever you throw a stick, I won't leave you, ever," he grinned at me, probably trying to lighten the mood. It worked to an extent.

I liked the sound of that probably more than I should have. At least he would never leave me. And at least he couldn't have another girlfriend while I'm around, at least. I _definitely_ liked that more than I should have, but I didn't care. I felt a bit silly, all that unnecessary anguish for nothing.

There would only be me in his future, in the girl department at least. The thought was slightly comforting, even though I had no idea why.

"You know, I've never much liked dogs," I told him with a grin as well, thinking of Mr. Pumpernickel and Mrs. Hexameter. I shuddered just thinking about them. I've never been much of an animal person ever.

He laughed and turned to look at the surf. It looked beautiful today, even more so now that I didn't have a gigantic ax of worry hanging over my head. The water was clear and blue, and the trees seemed greener, even though it was November and the temperature was lowering considerably as the months wore on.

"That's too bad," he told me as I saw someone jumping off the cliff that was nearest to us. "Whoa," I said. "Did someone just jump off the cliff?" I asked in awe. That was so cool.

Seth sighed, and then smiled at what seemed to be an inside joke of sorts, "Yeah. It's recreation for us down at La Push. We don't have a shopping mall or a movie theater over here, and the nearest one is in Hoquiam, which as you know is thirty miles away."

"You have to take me sometime, it looks like fun."

"Okay, but only when the water warms up, those people are probably the last of the season."

Seth frowned again, seeing through my attempt to distract him.

"You know what you were saying before, about vampires…" he told me, trying to gauge my reaction. I tried to keep my face as smooth as possible.

"Well, I was wondering… how do you know about them?"

Damn.

**A/N: I love what a hypocrite Sophie can be! She says she doesn't lie (and she really doesn't, so she says) and yet all she does all day it seems is lie to herself! It's infuriating sometimes, don't you think? Oh, and go read the story Memoirs_ of the Bitter Sweet_ by Clarissa Frey for me please. It's amazing! **


	13. Confession

Chapter Twelve: Confession

Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. We were so _not _going to have this discussion now. I mean, I was going to tell him eventually (try months from now). Just not now, definitely not now. But why prolong the inevitable? I just really didn't want to tell him, with really no reason for it.

Is it because I felt a loyalty to Peter, who I love, even though he is dead and gone, and has been for years? Even though I was pretty sure that Seth knew about vampires (obviously) was I still holding on to that bit of insanity that I had been going on for years? That he really would come back?

God, I was being ignorant.

"Why do you want to know?" I asked him, stalling a bit, I'll admit.

"Just curious," he told me, an innocent look locking over his features.

"You do know that curiosity killed the cat."

"Ah, yes. But as the saying goes, satisfaction brought him back," we both laughed at our ridiculousness, but Seth wasn't giving up.

"Won't you tell me? Please?" he asked me with a look so tragic that it almost made me sad enough to tell him. Almost.

"Fine, but it's not that great of a story. I don't know why you would want to hear it," I couldn't hear the pain in my voice yet, but I was sure that it was coming. "It doesn't have a very happy end, because if it did I wouldn't be standing here with you right now. I don't know where I'd be, even though that's an interesting prospect. Seth nodded, prodding me to continue. I didn't know what to think. Here I was, standing on the beach about to tell someone secrets that haven't been shared to anybody except me, and I selfishly wanted to keep it that way, even though it probably needed to desperately be shared.

"Well I met Peter when I was fourteen. I was waiting for my mom to come pick me up from a friend's house. I was only a few blocks away, but I didn't want to walk in the dark, since the neighborhood that we lived in at the time wasn't exactly the best ever, if you catch my drift. I was waiting under a lamppost, when I see two people entering an alleyway. I didn't pay much attention to it, they were probably high or stoned or something among those lines, something that wasn't entirely abnormal in this part of Hoquiam. I heard what sounded like a scream, and went to investigate. I didn't know what I would find there, but I went to go look anyway. I was a very nosy person at the time, and I probably was imagining that I would be the next Nancy Drew.

"Anyway, what I found there was completely not what I was prepared for. I found a man on the floor drained of all color, and a woman whose neck was attached to another man's lips. I couldn't see properly, since his back was towards me, but that is what the scene looked like to me," this next part was going to be hard, because I remembered this so completely. I had long since burned the images of my life with Peter into my mind, and remembered almost everything with complete clarity.

"He turned around, no doubt hearing my approach, and dropped the woman at his feet. He turned towards me and I noticed that his eyes were a bright red. He stared at me, and all I wanted to do was back up and pretend that this had never happened. I also didn't want him to hurt me, because I knew right away that he wasn't human. It wasn't hard to guess what he was afterwards, though. 'Wait' he told me, 'Please don't be frightened.' I decided to take the lead. 'What's your name?' I asked. And it just went on from there. We began talking for hours, and when it became obvious that my mom wasn't coming to pick me up, he gave me a piggyback ride home.

"I was worried that he wouldn't come back, but he did the day after I had found him. And the day after that, and the day after that, and the day after that, and well, you get the picture. I began to fall in love with him. Don't doubt me," I told Seth, because he gave me a look of disbelief. "People fall in love at the age of fourteen all the time. At any rate that is not the case here. He told me everything about the world of vampires, and he began to love me too. He told me on October 24th actually, if you were wondering. I was euphoric. That time of my life was one of the happiest.

"By then we were planning on my being turned into a vampire as well. He wouldn't go into the specifics of it all, but I wanted it and so did he. The date was set on my eighteenth birthday. He said he didn't want to change me too young.

"But then people came looking for him. And by people I mean vampires, as you know. Well, they really weren't looking for him, per se. They were having a sweep of the city, since there were 'illegal' things going on in Seattle, and they didn't want anyone else to get similar ideas. But when they saw Peter and me, we didn't even notice them. We were simply walking down the streets, holding hands and talking about nothing too important. When they saw this, they knew something was up, so they called in their superiors. The main leader knew all of his thoughts from a single touch, and they knew that he had told me, and as you probably already know, the main vampire law is to keep their true identity a secret.

If it had happened on another day or another time, we might have avoided this completely. But it didn't, and it happened at the time that it did, so he was going to be penalized for it. Or rather I was, but he wouldn't let that happen. They were going to kill me. It was all planned out. Peter was going to watch, because that was their way, and they were going to drain me. Anyway, we were going to meet in a clearing not too far from Hoquiam. I was all prepared to die. But Peter didn't let that happen, unfortunately. At the last minute he offered himself as a replacement, and it all happened so fast that I didn't even have the chance to blink, let alone protest. And then he was gone," the pain of this whole story was heavily weighted on that last word. Even I could hear it, and at the sound of my pain Seth's eyes tightened.

But I didn't cry. I have never cried for Peter, not even after he died. I never could explain it to myself. Before him, I cried at the slightest of things, such as when my pet would die, or a really sad movie or book. But after…I never cried again. Ever. I haven't cried in six years, which is quite a feat for women, or so I've heard. Not even when I saw a sad movie or read a sad book. Not even if a tragedy passed on in my life, like my grandmother dying a year later. Never again.

For a while I wondered if there was something wrong with me, but I soon realized that it didn't matter, because I truly did not care. It was probably for the best. If everyone always cried for every little thing that hurt them or touched on them on a personal level the world would be overrun with tears and we would all drown to death in the process.

Seth started walking away, and I stared after him. After all I told him, did he really want to leave me? Could he walk away from me so easily? Everyone else seemed to be able to. I caught up to him, in no mind to be left behind for anything.

"What's wrong?" I asked him truly worried. He was scaring me a little, to be honest.

"Who were the vampires who were looking for you and Peter?" he asked me, and I pretended to think about it for a minute.

"The Volturi," I whispered. I would always remember that name, no matter how many other things got stuffed into my brain.

"We've had a run in with them before," Seth told me softly, and I stiffened up in panic. I didn't want Seth to be anywhere near their bright red eyes, it hurt even to imagine him there.

"Wait, what?!" I exclaimed, very nearly having a panic attack. How could he spring something upon me like that? What, with my already deteriorating set of nerves, he was going to push me over the edge if he wasn't careful.

"It's nothing to be scared of, I'm pretty sure that they won't be back anytime soon," Seth told me, putting his warm hand on the side of my face. I leaned into it for a bit, letting the pleasant warmth was away my worries.

I nodded, believing him. "Did they really want to kill you?" he asked me again, his face contorting in odd ways. I never wanted to see him look like that again, so I answered him quickly.

"Yes, but they didn't. I'm standing here with you, aren't I?" He nodded, but his face was still contorted. I was worried about him; he didn't need to be feeling anything bad over me. I stood up on my tiptoes, not quite reaching his ear and whispered soothingly, "Don't worry about me, they aren't coming back for me either, and I'm getting better every day, now that you're here with me."

It amazed me that the second part of what I was saying to him was true; I could feel that to my very core. But the second part, not so much. Because I knew that they were coming back for me, and there was nothing that I and my mortal self could do about that.

**A/N: Okay, here's another annoying author's note. I wasn't going to put anything on here so not to ruin the ending, but I couldn't help myself. **

**Well, the reviews are _amazing_, thank you all so, so much! I can't believe how many reviews this story is getting now, but thank you so much! I'm glad all of you like Sophie, I wasn't quite sure that anyone would really like her, (except for maybe me) but it pleases me that you all do. Y'all are amazing! **

**Thanks (for the third time) so much!**

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	14. Party

Chapter Thirteen: Party

I twirled in the mirror, feeling like a two year old, but I giggled. I was going to Seth's birthday party today and was excited as hell. I was finally going to meet his pack and other 'cool people' that he had been telling me about for a while now.

I was excited about something for once, and I wasn't going to waste the opportunity of my mother being gone from home for about another week. I was wearing a t-shirt and jeans, and actually worked on my appearance for once and curled my hair, for a reason that was foreign even for me. For some reason I wanted to make a good impression.

God, I needed to be slapped.

I heard a honk outside my house and flew down the stairs, anxious to get to Seth's car as fast as possible. As soon as I got to him I went and gave him a big hug, and he laughed at me. "What's your problem?" he asked me.

"I dunno, I'm just really excited, that's all."

I decided to turn up the music, too jittery to talk. "Ugh, Seth. Eighties music? I would have pegged you to have better taste than that!" I exclaimed, wrinkling my nose in distaste. But soon a familiar song came on, and I couldn't help sing along to the chorus.

"_Don't stop believing/Hold on to the feeling/streetlight people," _I sang, and Seth winced dramatically.

"Sophie, you suck," he told me cheerfully, and I took a swipe at him. That was a bad idea; I think I sprained my hand.

"Fuck!" I yelled, and Seth immediately slammed on the brakes.

"Are you okay?" he asked me so worriedly it was almost funny. I would have laughed at him if my hand didn't hurt so much.

"Yes, I'm fine, let's go, let's go, let's go," I told him excitedly, jumping up and down in my seat a little. I wasn't about to miss this part for my stupidity.

"Are you sure?" he asked, and I nodded. My hand only throbbed a bit now, and he wasn't going to take me to the emergency room like I could tell that he was contemplating right now.

"Are you positive?" he asked again and I exploded on him.

"Yes, goddamn it! Now leave me alone, and let's go!!!"

"Okay," he told me with a laugh, and I felt the need to change the subject.

"So who's all going to be there?" I asked him curiously. He never gave me a definite answer; evidently things weren't planned out very far in advance for werewolves.

"Well Collin and Brady are definitely going. And so are Sam and Emily, Jared and Kim, and Embry, me and you, obviously. Paul is going, but Rachel isn't going to be there, Rachel is his imprint, she's over at UCLA for an extra year of school or something. Mom and Leah aren't coming, Mom went to go visit Leah's dorm for a while. Quil and Jacob both wanted to come, but they couldn't."  
"Why?"

"Because Quil hasn't told Claire about his being a werewolf yet, because she's only six, and he wants to take her to the zoo or something. And Jacob and Nessie can't come because they've got… complications to deal with," Seth explained, and I understood. I could understand Quil not wanting Claire to know, but she was going to find out eventually anyway, and then they'd be happy, I hoped.

So ten people were going to be there, and to me that seemed to me like a lot. I haven't been in a group of people that large in a very long time.

I began to get butterflies in my stomach and not the good kind. I was suddenly very nervous, and had the strangest urge to start chewing on my fingernails. "What's wrong?"Seth asked as he watched my emotions play out on my face.

"I'm just nervous," I told him.

"Why, everyone will love you," he told me, and that was amazingly exactly what I wanted to hear. "And if they don't like you then I'll kick all their asses for you."

"Thanks," I told him sarcastically.

And then we were there. We were in front of a tiny house right by the beach, I could hear the waves.

"Are you ready?" he asked me, and I nodded silently.

I gripped his hand for reassurance as we stepped inside the door.

~*~*~*~

The party seemed to be in full swing by the time that we got there, even without the birthday boy in attendance. There was a huge food table in the middle of the backyard. The music was loud, and everyone was in a shape resembling a circle talking and laughing. They looked like one big family, and I felt like I was an outsider of the largest degree.

I felt Seth give my hand a reassuring squeeze as we neared the large group of exceptionally large people, and I breathed in my nose and out my mouth trying to relax. I felt myself start building up that façade that I hadn't had to use in so long, and I struggled against it. I was _not_ going to ruin this for myself. I tore down the wall a beautiful girl with long dark hair grabbed my free hand and introduced herself.

"Hi, I'm Emily," she told me with a smile on her face. She was very pretty, on one side of her face. But on the other side were horrible, appalling scars. There were three of them, all of them being thick and a bright red color even though they couldn't have been very new. They looked like claw marks, and I saw that they continued down to her hand. I adverted my eyes politely back to hers. For some reason the scars on her skin gave me a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"I'm Sophie," I introduced myself, and smiled at her a little bit. She smiled at me back, the unscarred side of her face turning absolutely gorgeous with her face all lit up.

"This is Sam," she told me, introducing the man that was standing closest to her. "And here's Collin and Brady, and then there's Jared and Kim, but don't mind them if they start randomly making out and you catch them. It happens all the time," she told me with a laugh.

"That was only once!" the girl who I assumed was Kim exclaimed as she turned bright red with embarrassment, while the man that was by her side, Jared, just grinned guiltily.

"Any who, this is Paul and Embry," she said as she pointed out the last two men in the circle who she didn't introduce. "I don't think that we're missing anyone. It's not _everyone_, but it's close enough." She smiled at me again, and I dropped Seth's hands when I noticed that she looked at them with wide eyes. I mean, she couldn't get the wrong idea. I mean Seth and me, we weren't, I mean we couldn't be…

The girl named Kim came up to me, interrupting my musings. "Hi Sophie," she said as she came up to me.

"Hi," I told her breaking free of my shyness. Kim was pretty, but it wasn't an obvious pretty, like Emily. She grew prettier the longer you looked at her, and her hair was amazing. I towered over both of them, and I felt like a giant. Why do I have to be five feet eleven? I would have settled for five foot four.

"I thought Seth was never going to tell you. I mean, it took him long enough. Emily and I wanted to meet you a long time before this, but Seth was afraid of scaring you off," she announced to me. This shocked me. That explains it, then.

"Come on Sophie, I can't wait until we can have everyone together at the bonfires again. As soon as it gets warm enough, we have to have another one, don't you think Emily?"

They talked about it for a while before I excused myself to go find Seth. They seemed really nice, but it would be nice to have some familiarity around. I found him with Brady and Collin, no surprise there. They were all bent over laughing and I felt curiosity at something that Seth could find so funny. They sobered up as soon as I walked up, and I frowned for a bit, but then got over it. I was pretty sure that it was something raunchy and I wasn't sure that I wanted to know.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," Seth answered immediately, and I saw Brady roll his eyes at Collin, and Collin nodded. I smiled at them and they grinned back.

"I'm Brady," one of them said, just as the other said, "I'm Collin." They looked pretty similar. In fact, all of them did, especially from far away. They were all tall and humongous, all with short black hair and chiseled jaws.

"Oh Seth, it's time for you to blow out the candles. Everyone wants to eat it now," I heard Kim call.

"And if you don't hurry your ass up I'll eat it for you," I heard Paul call, and everyone laughed, even Seth.

Seth grabbed my hand as we came up to the table, and I heard Brady and Collin making kissy noises behind his back. I turned around and laughed with them. It was amazing how used I was getting to having his warm hand wrapped around my own. Without it I felt cold in comparison.

We all sang him happy birthday, and when Seth had his face close to the cake as he blew out the candles, Brady shoved his face into it, making him look like he had a icing mask all on his face.

A very predictable cake war rang out until Emily demanded that we all at least pretend that we were adults, since we had more cake on us than actually went into our mouths. I had cake everywhere, seeing as how I got the vanilla icing smeared onto my head by Collin. I didn't care though; it was more fun than I had had in a long time.

"I was glad that you were there," Seth told me when I asked him about his birthday party.

"Why, I'm sure something similar would have happened, even if I wasn't there. I didn't add much to the party," I told him as I adjusted the towel on my seat, since Seth got all anal on me, and wouldn't let any bit of icing touch his car. Frigging douche bag, it's just a car.

"I don't know, but having you with me makes me happy," he told me, and I believed him.


	15. Painkillers

Chapter Fourteen: Painkillers

I didn't want to get out of bed, and there was no way that I was going to do anything of consequence by myself. I had a horrible dream last night, a never ending one that didn't stop until I woke up this morning. All that I saw was that horrible day in the clearing over and over again.

This wasn't as bad as the first time. The first time was horrible. I was broken beyond the hope of repair, and I didn't want help. All I did was get violently sick and throw up. I just sat on my bed thinking about Peter's golden hair, and his smile, and his voice. I became numb once again, just when I thought that I was getting better. That was when decide to cultivate my perfect façade of bitchiness and coldness.

I didn't know what I was going to do today, but I knew that I wasn't going to be able to see people today. I wouldn't be able to talk properly, and I would probably just muck things up for myself.

But things weren't bad enough that I couldn't see Seth. The truth was that I needed him. He was my own personal painkiller and it was with a throbbing heart that I called him. "Seth," I croaked into the phone, "would you come pick me up please?"

"Are you okay?" he asked me with anxiety. I assured him that I was fine, and that all I needed was him and that was entirely the truth.

He was at my house ten minutes faster than his usual thirty, and he didn't have his car with him. "Did you phase?" I asked him. He nodded, and then asked me what was wrong.

"Nothing, everything, Peter," I whispered. Nothing that couldn't be helped with you here. I shuddered to think of years past on this day, and what I did. It wasn't exactly happy, and I didn't even want to go there.

"Can you please not think about it, whatever it is? Please? I don't like the look in your eyes, it's scaring me. It makes you look half dead, and half pained. Please don't," he told me, and I tried to clear my eyes, but I don't know if it worked.

I understood the dead part. Because it felt like when Peter died, a part of me died too. Everything, the part of me that Peter took with him and the whole life that we had planned together was just…gone. I was the only one who had to deal with picking up the pieces of myself, what was left anyway, and I didn't do a very good job of it. But then along came Seth, and he made me whole again. He brought my pieces back, and brought a few more along with him. And I loved him for it.

Love…of what importance did that make? There were several types of love. There was the sweep you off your feet kind, which everyone felt at least once in your life. There was the building kind of love, the kind of love that you fall slowly into, something that everyone feels. And then there was brother and sister love, a love so pure that nothing could ruin it except extreme circumstances. And then there was the platonic love that one feels for a friend, either male of female.

For Seth, I'd put him into the last category. But looking into his dark eyes, and seeing the feelings there I wasn't so sure. I mean, yes he imprinted on me, but he didn't fall in love with me. Would he ever? Could he? I mean, there were always possibilities, but there could also be the negatives as well. He couldn't love _me_ this broken shell of a person.

It was an insane hope, but a fervent one. I realized that with all my heart that I wanted him to love me. The realization of that process shocked me as much as a snake's bite would. I wanted him to be by me always, a self-centered hope, but a desperate one.

_Seth_ was the one who had jumped over the wall that I had built around myself. _Seth_ was the one person that I knew would wait for me to heal completely. _Seth_ was the person that I cared about most, he had to be.

What would it be like if I was in love with Seth? Would it be like what I had with Peter? Would it be stronger, since he imprinted on me? And why did what I was wondering feel like a betrayal?

I always muck everything up.

I wasn't sure how I felt about him, or anyone else for that matter. I needed to think, to wait, and to figure out my own heart, but not today. I wouldn't be able to do it properly myself.

I sighed as Seth looked at me worriedly. Things never work out properly in life.

"I'm fine, I just… I don't know. Is Sue at the house today?" I asked him, hoping for a positive answer.

"Yes, would you like to go see her?"

"Yes please," I told him and he drove me in my own car, because I honestly didn't feel the need to drive.

When I saw Sue she immediately looked alarmed. I sighed internally. This really wasn't that big of a deal, this had been going on for years before. But I must look really bad, but I wouldn't know, I didn't look at myself in the mirror this morning.

"Seth you can leave now," she told him, and he looked like he was going to object, but then she told him, "Jacob called for you after you left, he needs you," and with that Seth ran to the woods, vibrating as he went.

"Okay honey, what's wrong?" she asked me lovingly, but I didn't even feel the need to tear up. I told her the whole story, from beginning to end, leaving out less stuff than I did for Seth. It was easier to tell her too, than it was to tell Seth.

She listened aptly, and before I knew it I was done.

"Let go," she told me. "I see what you're doing here, and even though it's only natural you need to let him go. You've put up walls around yourself, you've done things that you aren't proud of, but that is all in the past, and you have a very bright future before you."

"You don't know what its like," I told her, believing it to be true. How was I supposed to know any different?

She got angry with me though, which surprised me. "Don't know what it's like, what do you mean I don't know what it's like. I do know what it's like, actually. I lost the love of my life six years ago. I loved him dearly, he was my Peter. But I moved on too. And then with Leah, do you think that I didn't suffer with my daughter when ever Sam imprinted on Emily, even though she was in love with him first? Do you think I didn't suffer when we had to cut her hair so she could join the pack more easily? I had to watch her come home everyday looking like you did this morning. And you know what? She's going to be a bridesmaid this summer. I know what it's like to lose someone you love more than your own self. And I sure as hell don't want to have to watch Seth suffer like Leah did. Don't make this harder than it is already," she yelled at me, fire glinting in her eye. And I realized that she was so very right, and that I was just being selfish. I did need to let go, but I didn't want to. It felt like I couldn't, that it would literally tear me in half to do it.

Ugh, this was beginning to feel too much like a soap opera. A seriously twisted, gothic soap opera with way more vampires and werewolves, but less sex and alcohol.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything," I apologized, "I didn't know what I was saying."

"It's quite alright," she said, acting formal.

Then we began to move on to lighter topics and I asked her how her day with Leah went.

"Good," she told me, "Leah met a few new nice girls, they're her roommates. She was so worried about not liking her roommates, but now she completely loves them. I found out that she was planning on majoring in physical therapy, and that she was taking yoga just for fun." I love talking to moms, they always tell you much more about their kids than their kids want you to now.

"Does Leah still phase?" I asked, and Sue shook her head.

"No, I don't think so, that is what the yoga classes are for, I think."

"Can I ask you something?" I asked her. I had been curious about this since the party, but I didn't dare ask Emily.

"Sure."

"I was wondering what the story on Emily's scars was," I told Sue hesitantly. I could tell that it wasn't just a mauling from a bear like everyone else in town thought.

Sue told me the whole story, from beginning to end, and I think I cried a little. It was all just so sad, pain all the way around. I wondered what it must do to Sam when he has to look her straight in the face and realize what he had done. Because it was him, and his temper that had done it, there was no one else to blame. And then with Leah and Emily, Leah has more dignity than I would ever have. Sam broke every single promise that he made to her.

And then Seth came in and we started promptly talking about the chance of snow, something we were looking forward to.

"What did I miss," Seth asked me afterwards, and I shrugged.

"Nothing much," I told him.

**A/N: That chapter was kind of pointless, but absolutely necessary. It took me forever to feel happy with it, but I'm finally happy with it now. Hey, how would you guys feel about some Seth's POV for the next chapter??? Please review!**


	16. Seth's POV Chapter title is too long!

**Seth's Point of View**

Chapter Fifteen: Ice Skating Isn't the Only Thing That Hurts

As I stood over Sophie's bed I wondered how she was going to react. She was probably going to tell me off or scream, even though knowing Sophie she would probably do the first one.

She looked so pretty as she slept. Her hair was everywhere, but in a good way, because it was so long. Her face was free of all emotion, peaceful, with the hint of a smile on her face. I wondered what she was dreaming about.

I was only doing something this creepy because today was her birthday, and I was going to go do whatever she wanted to do in Hoquiam, because mom was with Charlie, and since Sophie didn't know about Charlie… well, this would be easier, because that was something that my mom needed to explain.

I could look at her all day like this if it didn't feel slightly wrong and stalkerish. For not the first time I wished that I was like Alice so I could know when she was going to wake up.

Her eyes fluttered, and I held my breath, waiting for her reaction. Her eyes were slightly unfocused, and I could tell that she couldn't see clearly. "What the hell? Who the fuck are you?" she screeched, and smashed a glass of water that she had on her bed side table against the side of my face.

I had to admit that it hurt a little, and shards of glass were everywhere, with the water all over her floor and bed. I guess my head is harder than a normal person's because the glass didn't leave any pieces in me; they just ricocheted off the side of my face against the wall.

I was bleeding, but I could tell that nothing permanent was happening, and I could feel the bleeding stop. But Sophie didn't know this, and when she finally figured out who I was she gasped, pulling her hand to her mouth. "Oh my god! Seth! Are you okay, did I hurt you? Oh my god I am so stupid, I should have known! I need to take you to the emergency room right now! Here, hold this to the side of your face, and we'll get going," she told me, talking at the speed of light. I touched her shoulder, in an attempt to calm her down. She looked like she was about to have a heart attack.

"It's okay Sophie. Chill. Come on, do it with me now, breathe in and out, in and out, in and out, come on slowly and evenly and you've got this,"

"Shut up," she told me, and I could tell that she would have smiled if she wasn't so worried about me. I almost rolled my eyes; nothing was going to happen to me.

"Look, I'm already healing see?" I told her as I cleaned off most of the gore off my face with her already blood stained comforter.

"Oh," she said, and she frowned. "How'd you do that?" she asked.

"Wolf thing," I told her, and she nodded, looking relived. I was still surprised at how she took the werewolf thing so easily. She was so worried about things all the time, I could tell, but there wasn't a reason to worry anymore. I would always protect her, no matter what the cost. But it's not like you could tell someone that without sounding cheesy.

"So what do you want to do for your birthday?" I asked, seeing her instantly brighten up. I smiled; it wasn't always this easy to make her happy.

"I want to go ice skating, I haven't seen Jan in so long, and besides, I want to see you ice skate," she told me. "But first we have to clean this mess that I made, sorry about that, by the way."

As I got the bleach Sophie got dressed in a pink University of Washington hoodie, and jeans, making me feel under dressed. I hated going out in public during winter, because you had to dress like everyone else. It was such a pain when you had to phase.

Once we got all that cleaned up I went out to the drive way so that Sophie could get ready 'properly' which I guessed meant make-up and stuff. I leaned against my car waiting for her. I had already eaten, so I was just waiting for her to hurry up. Everything should be open by now, since it was about nine o' clock.

Sophie came out looking like an angel in jeans and she walked up to her bug. "No," I said, shaking my head. "There is no way that I am getting in that thing," I told her. It was just so uncomfortable, and I was so cramped, even with the seat pushed all the way back. I was surprised that Sophie could fit in it comfortably; she was pretty tall by normal people's standards.

"Please? I mean, it's my birthday, after all."

"No," I told her. If she kept looking at me like that I was going to give in…

"Fine, but next time you go car shopping, I'm going with you. You can't just drive around a red Expedition for the rest of forever. It's unnatural," she griped, getting in gracelessly into my car.

"Maybe my friend Edward would give me a car or two. He has enough to spare," I said, thinking that if I could just get Bella to convince him before he 'heard' about my plan. Hmm… that could work. Soon Sophie brought me out of my scheming mode.

"So have you ever been ice skating before?" she asked me, and I shook my head. I seriously hadn't, even though I lived in Washington state all my life, I'd never skated on a pond or anything. I did go roller skating once though, and I told her that. She laughed at me.

"Seriously?" she asked me, and I nodded.

"Wow, well I have to teach you how. It's so fun once you learn how," I smiled at her randomly because I could, and she did the same back, after looking at me for a second.

As we walked up to the small skating rink she grabbed my hand. She didn't have gloves on and her hands were ice cold. "Sorry, I needed to warm them up somehow," she told me with a grin.

I liked holding Sophie's hand. It was nice, but for me, every time she touched me I felt a surge of electricity went through her body and into mine. I remember the first time that I tried to hold her hand she pulled away from me. That hurt me feelings a little bit, but it showed me where we were at that time. But now we were more comfortable with each other. We could hold hands in and she wouldn't freak out on me.

But that didn't mean that there was anything behind the hand holding. For Sophie, at least, it was an empty gesture, nothing more than what it seemed to other people.

I was in love with her, and I had been for a long time. I hadn't told her yet, because I was scared of her reaction. She was still so obviously in love with Peter that it hurt my heart just to see her like that. Especially that day last week that she got me to come over and take her to La Push. Her eyes had honestly scared me a little, and I didn't like to see them, ever. But she seemed so much better now as she swung our hands back and forth.

I smiled at our hands and then looked away so that she didn't see me looking. We walked in without paying, but she seemed so at ease here that I didn't want to break it.

"Jan!" Sophie cried as she ran up to a man with a graying auburn beard and hair and a track suit, "This is Seth, Seth this is Jan," she told me, and he held out his hand, and I shook it.

"Can we skate here today, please? Seth has never skated before in his life, and I want to teach him," she told the man. Jan nodded and then motioned to a room that was near the entrance of the rink. "Come on, we need to get you some skates," she told me, and she practically pulled my arm off to get to the room.

It turned out that I needed the largest size, and we almost didn't find any that would fit, until Sophie lucked out and pulled a dusty black pair out of a box that we had found lying in the corner. "I found some!" she crowed it triumph, and I laughed at her. She looked so insanely happy for what seemed to me like almost nothing.

"Okay, I want to see you ice skate," I told her. I wasn't about to go first, and besides, I wanted to see if she was any good or not.

"I'm not very good," she told me as she glided out to the middle of the rink.

She went to the edge and did a turn on one leg, and then she glided to the other side, her hands behind her back, as she grinned back at me. She launched herself back up into the air, and twisted gracefully into the air, her hair going everywhere. She was laughing as she landed, when she saw my expression.

"'Not very good my arse," I mumbled as she flew back to me.

"What did you think?" she asked as she came up.

"That was incredible," I told her, and I wasn't lying. She looked like a professional out there, to my untrained eye.

"You could've kept your axle tighter though, Sophie," Jan told her from the other side.

"Thanks, Jan. I'll work on that" she told him with a grin, and he smiled back. They evidently were friends.

"Jan was an Olympic skater once, and he works with girls and boys, giving them lessons. He gives me free ones sometimes, since I come, or came, here so much. He's really cool once you get to know him," Sophie explained to me in a hushed whisper.

"Okay my turn," I told her as I walked out onto the ice. This was harder than I thought! I could barely walk, and I was scared of what would happen once I stepped on the ice with my skate on.

"You know, you could've put your skates on, on the ice." Great, now she tells me. Well here goes nothing I thought, and stepped on the ice. I fell promptly on my butt. Grand.

Sophie was laughing at me, she was bent over. "Oh my god! Can't. Breathe," she told me as I got up. Haha, this wasn't funny.

"Haha, hilarious," I said flatly, and she grinned.

"I'm so happy today, can you tell?" she asked me, and I nodded. I wanted to be able to do this just as well as she could. I was about to fall over again, but I grabbed the side and held on.

"Teach me?" I asked her and she grabbed my hand and started pulling me.

"Yes, now just put one foot in front of the other," she told me, and I started doing what she said, and it worked. I could do this! Well, not really well, but close enough. I gripped her hand tighter, not for support really, but just because I wanted to.

"Good, now let's see you stop," she told me as she stopped a foot or self in front of me, her hand still in mine. I tried.

"Oomph!" I said, and I fell onto the hard ice, taking Sophie with me. She was laughing at me again as she landed right on top of me.

"Opps, sorry," she giggled. I looked into her laughing eyes, and suddenly they weren't laughing anymore. The stared straight into mine, and her breathing (and mine, for that matter) got heavier. She was so close. I looked into her eyes, and saw something in them that I'd never seen before. And her mouth looked so pink and pretty, I only had about five inches to go…

She rolled over onto the ice and stood up immediately. I couldn't read her face as I got up, and as soon as I did, she glided away from me.

I needed to tell her, today. She needed to know, and I couldn't put it off forever. It was bound to slip out of my big mouth eventually.

"Sophie," I told her, and she whirled around to face me, a nervous looking smile on her face. "I-I love… that color on you," Damn it! I was a wimp, a very wimpy wimp. This would have been the perfect time to tell her too!

"Are you getting gay on me, or something?" she asked me, and I growled at her.

"No," I told her. I was pretty much the opposite of homosexual at this point, but I would never tell her that.

"Okay, just making sure, but I like that color on you too," she told me sarcastically.

"Are you done wanting to skate yet?" I whined. I would continue ice skating forever, if she asked me to, I knew, but I was done as of right now, and this was getting majorly awkward.

"Yeah, let's go," she said as she went to go put her shoes on and we walked out to my car, keeping a careful non touching distance away from each other. This was getting ridiculous. I should just be a man and tell her that I loved her with trumpets in the back ground.

But I couldn't tell her, not yet. She wasn't ready and neither was I, I could tell that much. We went and ate lunch, and she took me shopping. I have to admit I wasn't bored watching her try on outfits that she probably would never wear, and then she took me to the store that we had met in, I could tell because I remember the dress that she had been looking at when I first saw her.

That day scared the crap out of me, I remembered. First I imprinted on a blonde girl in a store, and then she almost gets hits by a bus because I scared the crap out of her! And then she fainted, not exactly the most reassuring thing in the world. I was so thankful that my mom used to be a nurse on that day. I don't know what I would have done if she didn't wake up.

"What do you think?" she asked as came out. She looked beautiful, as usual, and I told her so. I seemed to be telling her a lot today.

She blushed, and said thanks. She looked at the dress on her body longingly, and she gasped as she saw the price tag. "I want to go to prom in this dress," she told me. "Will you go with me?" she asked. I have to admit that I was surprised. Sophie didn't seem the type of person who wants to go to prom.

"Sure, I'll go," I told her, and she beamed at me.

"Great!"

She looked sadly at the dress again and she went to go take it off. As we were walking by the dress, I decided that I wanted to buy the dress for her she seemed to like it so much. When I saw the dress I felt like gasping as well. It was over three thousand dollars! As much as I wanted to get it for her, I couldn't afford something like that ever.

When we got to her house her mom wasn't home, as usual. I had no idea how Sophie could live without her mother, and how her mother could choose to leave her. It was hard for me to imagine anyone not wanting Sophie, or loving her.

_My_ mother, however, loved Sophie like a second daughter, and she was glad that I imprinted on her, and she told me so more than once. Of course, I was glad too, but it's not like I had any choice in the matter. But I couldn't be bitter about it, it was impossible once the imprinting was done, and besides, I just wasn't a very bitter person.

I was always amazed by the size of Sophie's house, it was humongous compared to mine, but Sophie always seemed to like mine better for some reason. Her house was two stories and had a balcony in the back over looking a lake, and she lived in one of the best neighbor hoods in Hoquiam, and the most expensive. But she never looked really happy here, and that surprised me, it seemed impossible for someone not to be happy in a house like this.

But she wasn't, I could tell.

"You know," she whispered. "Today was the day that Peter was planning on turning me into a vampire. I had it all planned out in my mind. I was going to be wearing a big, beautiful gown, and I was going to be lying down on the forest floor. And then he was going to bite my neck, and three days later we were going to be together forever. He never told me if it hurt, though. He didn't really answer my question whenever I asked him about it. He was always very vague. Do you know if it would have hurt or not?" she asked me, her expression blank, which worried me a little.

I hesitated. I didn't want to tell her the truth, because I was scared of her reaction. Of course I knew, Bella had told me. "Yeah, I do. Yes, it would've hurt a lot. I've asked Bella, and she said that it feels like fire is in your veins every second, and the whole time you want to die," it was painful imagining her like that, turning into a vampire. As much as I respect some of them, that wasn't something that I wanted to happen to her.

"Who's Bella?" she asked her face suddenly thoughtful.

"Well Bella was a normal girl who fell in love with a vampire," I began, and I told her the story. When I got to the part when Edward left Bella because he wanted to save her from being a vampire, and from the dangers of hanging around him, Sophie started to cry. She touched her face, and looked wonderingly at the wetness on her hands.

When I was finished telling her about Nessie, and how everything worked out in the end, she just gaped at me. "Is that story really real?" she asked me, her voice thick from the tears that were streaming down her face at the very end.

"Yep," I told her, popping the 'p'. "I was there for some of it too. And I've asked both Edward and Bella all about it, for the parts I've missed."

"Really? I want to meet them, I really do! Especially Renesmee, I can't believe it. A half-vampire. Wow."

I nodded. She would probably like Nessie, most people do. But I didn't want her around the rest of them, even though Edward is my best friend, because what if something happened to her? I don't think I could bear that.

"Well at least someone got their happy ending," I heard her whisper, so low that I wasn't probably supposed to hear. She sighed, and announced, "I'm tired." I wasn't surprised. We had a 'big' day, and it was eleven thirty.

"Then go to bed," I told her, and I got up and gave her a kiss on the forehead. Her eyes widened and she smiled at me again.

"Sleep with me," she said and I laughed. She then realized the double meaning of her words. "No really. No sex, just sleep with me. I don't want to stay here by myself, for once I want someone else to be here with me," she pleaded. I couldn't stand that, and I ended my indecision.

"Okay," I told her, and her face smoothed out in a smile. "Good," she breathed and we went up into her bedroom.

She fell on the bed, and patted the space right behind her. I smiled and lied down where she implied. I put my arms around her, and she didn't seem to mind.

I was going to do this. I was, and I was going to do it right now. This seemed like a good place to tell her.

"Sophie," I started.

"Mmm," she told me, and I hoped that she wasn't asleep.

I waited for a minute, before I began again, and I took a deep breath. "I love you," I told her.

She didn't answer. She was already asleep.

**A/N: Jeez! I thought Seth was never going to shut up! Since I wrote such a long chapter, can I have some extra long reviews please? Thanks for reading!**

**Love,**

**Dicey **


	17. Never Think

Chapter Sixteen: Never Think

I was standing in the middle of a corn field. I thought that was kind of weird, I mean, a corn field in Washington? Do they even grow corn here? But I didn't think too much of it. I began to run, for a reason that I didn't know.

Then I saw them, a line of black slowly starting to advance upon me. But it wasn't me I was looking at, they couldn't see me. Their blood red eyes were looking past me. I turned around, and it was Seth, I knew that automatically, even though instead of the man, in his place stood a large sandy colored wolf. He was by himself, and I could tell that he couldn't see me either, and his intelligent eyes were looking at the figures in the black. '_No!'_ I screamed, but it didn't matter, neither of them could hear me.

I saw the intent of is death in their cold red eyes and I tried to stop them, but I couldn't. I couldn't touch them. '_Not Seth too! Please don't!_ Don't take him from me!' I screamed, but they still couldn't hear me. I gave up in defeat, just watching, that seemed to be my purpose here. They came upon him, and they bit him, and he began to howl, and then scream as he became human again. They continued biting him, and he was bleeding horribly.

Then they began to tear him apart.

They tore his large body limb by limb. Then they began their fire, and I could smell him burning, the smell of burning flesh in my nose.

I woke up screaming, my throat getting hoarse. "Sophie! Sophie, Sophie, Sophie! It's okay, it was just a dream. It was just a dream. Shh," Seth told me gently. Oh! He was still alive. I was so happy.

I began to sob uncontrollably. I reached my arms up to Seth's neck and continued to sob there getting snot and salt water all over his neck. Four years worth of tears went on Seth's neck, and I was working on ruining his shirt. "I-I'm s-s-sorry, I j-just c-c-c-can't help i-it," I hiccuped into his chest.

He was just worried about soothing me. "Shh," he told me, "don't talk." He was rubbing his warm hand up and down my back and it felt really good. I was just so happy that I didn't have to face this alone, even though it was only a dream. I hoped he would stay with me more often; I don't like staying here by myself now.

I sat up and tried to wipe the last of my tears off my face. It was just a dream, just a really scary and hopefully not prophetic dream. Please don't let that happen, because of me, ever.

"Are you okay now?" he asked, his voice slightly stressed. I nodded, not sure that my voice was going to work properly. I couldn't voice my words. I wanted to thank him for letting me ruin his shirt with my salt water tears. It was stained wet all through out the front.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, "about your shirt," I told him, my voice barely audible.

"It's all good. I don't wear them much anyway," he told me with a slight grin. I smiled back limply in response. I crossed my arms over my chest and sat Indian style on my bed.

"What was it about?" he asked, and when I looked at him blankly, he added, "You're dream, I mean."

Oh. I bit my lip. Could I tell him? I looked into his dark eyes and saw something there that I had never noticed before. That looked fueled my decision. Of course I could. I could tell him anything. _Of course._ I could tell him anything.

I loved him.

Realization washed through me like a tsunami, bigger than the one that hit Indonesia. Oh my god, of course. I staggered backwards a little bit, wishing that I could hide the truth from myself for a little bit longer. Why did I have to figure out that I loved him now?

And love him I did, I loved him almost desperately, different from the way that I had even loved Peter. Stronger and more permanent. Because I was wrong when I told myself that Peter was my soul mate. Seth was completely. That was the reason that he imprinted on me, and not some other 'normal' girl like everyone else. We were meant to be together. He just hasn't realized it yet, just because I had. He didn't know that he felt like that about me. Not yet. Because love grows, like he said. And besides, even if he did love me I wouldn't be able to tell him anything.

Because what if he didn't feel the same yet? And what if he didn't say it back, or didn't mean it? I don't think that I could handle that.

"I had a dream that, you know what happened with Peter?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"I had a dream that that would happen with you, in the middle of a corn field, of all places. Yeah, random, I know."

He took my face in his hands and told me, "Nothing is going to happen to me. Don't even think that. _Never_ think like that. I will never leave you," he told me, his eyes intent in my face.

My eyes started to tear up. He wasn't the first person to tell me that. "Okay," I told him.

"What do you want to do," I asked him, "at four o' clock in the morning?"

"Does that kind of stuff happen to you a lot?"

"You mean those nightmares and stuff?" I asked him.

He nodded.

"Yeah, they've been happening for years now. Sometimes I don't remember them, though. That happens more often that not, so it's okay."

"This happens a lot then? When you're by yourself?"

"Yeah, of course. That's the first time that I've ever had a dream like that whenever someone was with me."

"Oh," he didn't say anything else. I decided it was time to go take a shower.

"I'm going to take a shower; you can go take one in my mom's room if you need to."

He nodded, and started walking out of my room. His head was down, and his shoulders were tense like he was thinking about something hard.

The shower felt so good and it helped me clear my head and think things through properly. I decided that I didn't want to tell Seth how I decided that I felt. I might have been a coward, but at least I was living as safely that hung out with werewolves and vampires could ever be.

I heard the phone ringing and I stepped out in my towel to go answer the phone. "Hello?" I answered as I walked down the stairs. I all but forgot that Seth was at my house, so imagine my surprise when I saw him waiting at the foot of the stairs for me. 'Who is it?' he mouthed to me. I shrugged, my towel almost falling off. Shit.

Seth laughed at me, and turned politely away. Thank god. I could only hear static at the other end of the phone.

"Hello?" I asked again.

"Is Seth Clearwater there? This has to do with one of his family members," an unfamiliar voice asked. It sounded like they had been crying. Oh my god… it isn't, no it can't be! I won't think of it, I don't want to jinx myself.

"Yes, here he is," I gave the phone to him, and I crossed my fingers. He looked at me questionably, but I just mouthed, 'I don't know.' I wasn't about to risk shrugging again.

I watched each flicker of emotion as Seth heard everything that the person on the phone was saying to him. At first he just looked shocked. His eyes were wide, and when they looked into mine, they suddenly grew fearful. No! No, no, no, no, no. That couldn't be happening, please tell me that this wasn't happening. But maybe it wasn't. Maybe something happened with one of the pack members or something. I seriously hoped that that was it.

"Are you sure that that was it? Is she okay?" he asked again. He then began to cry, tears steadily streaming down his face. It was just so… _off_ to see this man who was always so perpetually happy to be crying. I couldn't believe it. The only thing that could make him cry like that was either Leah… or his mother.

But nothing could happen to Sue, could it? But Sue had seemed so healthy… except for the sudden bouts of tiredness, and she had been going to a lot of doctor's visits lately. But she was just so alive all the time. Nothing could be wrong with her, could there be?

"Sophie, can you go get dressed please? I need to go somewhere," he told me, his voice shaking. I complied without another word. I didn't want to find out what he was so frightened about, but I needed to know fast. I didn't bother with make-up or anything fancy, I just picked up a jacket and a long sleeved shirt, fuck looking good.

"I'm ready," I told him in a dead tone of voice. I couldn't help it. "What's wrong?" I asked alarmed now that the tears on his face seemed to fall even faster.

"It's mom," he told me, his voice cracking. "She's in the hospital. She had a heart attack."

Oh. My. God.

**A/N: Review please!**


	18. Thinking About Tomorrow

Chapter Seventeen: Thinking About Tomorrow

We didn't say anything as we drive to the hospital in Seattle. There really is nothing to say. A woman that we both love is dying, or may be dead already, and there is nothing that we could do to help her. I couldn't stand this. Tears were pouring out of Seth's and my eyes steadily. I was holding his hand. I didn't know what I would do without him keeping me together; I would probably be dying slightly inside. Again.

I suddenly feel exhausted, probably from all the crying that I had been doing within the past twenty four hours or so, and the fact that ever since I found out that Sue had a heart attack, I've felt so drained of everything. I almost wish that I couldn't cry anymore, almost.

But could I be considered human if I wasn't crying? I don't think I was; I lost my humanity for a while. But when I found Seth, and love, again, I think I got it back.

And I'm strangely happy about it. Because I'm truly happy now, happier than I have been for a long time. And wasn't that what the whole point of Peter's sacrifice about? For me to still be _alive _not to be rotting away under a tombstone.

I was going to start living, today. I wasn't going to waste one more second of my life wallowing in grief, and being worried about someone that was gone.

I squeezed Seth's hand tighter, suddenly terrified. He looked at me, pulled out of his trance like state by the desperation that must have suddenly on my face. "What?" he asked me, his voice hoarse and laced with pain.

"Do you think that it's going to be alright?" I asked surprised by the emotion that was there. But of course I would be feeling sad, this woman was like the mother that I never had.

Seth shook his head. "I don't think so. I mean, the same thing happened to dad, and he was younger than mom is! He died after his heart attack at the hospital too. I just don't now, really. This is hard." He paused here and tapped the steering wheel so hard that the whole car shook violently. "Damn it! Why do bad things have to happen? Why?" he asked, suddenly angry. I had to admit that I was surprised. Seth was generally such a happy person; anger didn't suit his personality at all. But instead of being negative toward the anger, it just made me sad, and I wanted to help.

I didn't want him to be angry or upset. I wanted him to be happy with or without me. "I think… because it shows us how much we have to lose, and how much pain and suffering that other people have to deal with. We just get a glimpse into that. And because… it teaches us not to take people for granted, so that we have a feeling that we know exactly how much we lost. Does this make sense?" I didn't know, to me it just sounded like the ramblings of a stupid teenage girl, but maybe there was some truth there. "There's a reason for all of this, I'm sure," I told him. Just like there was a reason for Peter dying, I thought to myself. If he hadn't of died, I'm pretty sure that I would never have met Seth.

"I guess," he sighed. "It sure as hell doesn't make anything easier thought." _No, it really doesn't_, I silently agreed.

We pulled up to the hospital silently. The hospital was a small bleak grey building with a poorly decorated yard. I saw three familiar cars parked near ours when we got there. The whole pack must be here.

I saw Sam and Emily there. On her hand was an engagement ring that I didn't notice before, and she had a bouquet of flowers in her hand. Her eyes were red, and she came up as soon as she saw me to hug me, since everyone knew how close Sue and I had been. She then went to hug Seth, and we disconnected.

The pain I felt from when we were separated was physical. It felt like a part of me ripped away, and my body seemed to remember the pain better than I did.

I noticed a man that was even taller than Seth and Sam, as well as a girl with curly bronze ringlets. They didn't look very familiar, even though the man looked Quileute just like the rest of them.

Seth whispered in my ear, "That's Jacob and Nessie. Nessie is his imprint. Jacob's the alpha of my pack."

"Oh," I said feeling foolish. I had thought that there was just one pack; I had no idea that there were two. It blew my mind just to think of two packs of giant wolves running around.

I grabbed tightly onto Seth's hand again. There was no way that I was letting go of it now.

Brady and Collin arrived, and they too went and hugged Seth and I. It felt kind of funny, all of this physical contact, but I welcomed their warmth. It was nice to know that there were people other than Seth and I that were worried about Sue too.

I looked at the bronze haired girl and the man full in the face whenever they came over to us. The girl was exquisitely beautiful, with her pale skin and beautifully shaped brown eyes. She looked like she was only eleven, but the way she held herself made her seem much older. The man as extremely tall, and he stood protectively over her like he was about to go take a bullet it for her. For some reason it looked oddly familiar, but then I realized that was exactly how Seth stood by me the few times that he (or I) was stressed, scared, or worried.

I leaned into Seth as I realized this, and tried desperately not to cry. I could feel his warm hand in my hair and I hugged myself to him harder. The tears squeezed themselves out of their eyes as I managed to keep my sobs inside myself.

I didn't care that Jacob and Nessie were wondering what my problem was. All I wanted was for today to be like any other day and for me to be at Sue's house talking to her instead of being at this hospital waiting anxiously to see if she was alive or dead as doctors worked over her body.

I felt like asking the same question that Seth had. Why does stuff like this happen? It wasn't as bad as losing Peter had been, or how it would be to lose Seth now, but it still hurt bad enough. Sue really was the mother that I never had. Of course I had my 'proper' mother, but she wasn't really a mother to me. She was more like a roommate that paid for all of the rent, and everything else that could be paid for. And once I left for college it's not like she'll miss me or anything (I wouldn't be missing her all that much either, truth be told), she probably wouldn't care all that much. Not like Sue at all.

Just thinking about it all made me want to cry even harder, but I managed to pull myself together and breathe as calmly as I could. I turned away from Seth slowly, hoping my eyes weren't red.

Nessie was looking at me curiously and Jacob had a hand on her shoulder. She looked as if she wanted to say something, but she didn't. Instead, she put her hand on Jacob's face. He shook his head. "No, Ness, I don't think that it would work like that. Sorry." She nodded as if she expected this answer, and turned away from us and started walking down the hall way with what seemed like a sense of purpose. "Her grandfather works in this hospital, and she wanted to see if he was working on Sue or not," Jacob told me. I wondered briefly how he knew all that from what seemed to be a single touch, but then I realized that I didn't honestly care. I would think about that later, when I didn't have more pressing matters to attend to.

Just then a beautiful girl walked in and went straight up to Seth and hugged him fiercely. I felt a sharp pang of what I recognized to be jealously, but then I realized that this must be Leah. Her hair was pulled up into a long ponytail, and she and Jacob also embraced. She began to cry so hard that she shook. She even hugged Emily, and she saved Sam for last. She didn't talk the entire time, she just hugged everyone. She looked over me like she didn't see me entirely, like I wasn't even there. She must not have realized who I was.

"Leah," Seth called, "this is Sophie."

Leah turned around and looked me fully in the face for the first time. She was gorgeous, and I suddenly felt largely inadequate. Everyone here was so beautiful. "Oh," she said indifferently, "does she really care about mom, or is she just here?" she asked. I must admit that I got mad, but who wouldn't? Why would I be here if I didn't care?

"Leah!" Seth and Jacob hissed at the same time. Well, Seth was the one, who was really doing the hissing, Jacob just protested.

"What the hell? Of _course_ I'm here because I care. If I didn't care I wouldn't be standing here next to Seth taking abuse from someone like you, if I didn't care about Sue. Sue's like a mother to me, and she talked about you all the time. Honestly," I added at the end. How could she think that? She shouldn't start a bitch fight today anyway. Today wasn't about us, it was about Sue.

"Sorry, I'm just worried," she told me as she bit one of her fingernails. I was surprised that she told me something that personal. I nodded and she smiled at me, a hard smile, but what I interpreted as a real one. I smiled back wanting to cry. She was Sue's real daughter, and she just about let me into the family. I wanted to cry again.

We all sat down and got comfortable, and everyone was talking about things that I didn't now. Collin and Brady were talking in low voices, and Seth was talking to Leah and Jacob. Nessie came back and shook her head, and Jacob came back. "I've got to go take Nessie back to Bella and Edward, they're going to freak that I've kept her for so long," they both waved in parting, and for some reason the name Bella struck a cord with me.

"Nessie… Is that like who you told me about?" I asked. Seth nodded, and everything fell into place. I felt stupid not realizing it before. She was half vampire, which explained why she was so beautiful for looking so young.

We sat there for hours, and eventually Brady, Collin, Emily, and Sam had to leave. "Call us whenever you get any new information," Emily told me, and I nodded wordlessly. Leah had gotten antsy and began to walk around, barely able to walk around calmly. I knew how she felt, but I didn't want to be away from Seth.

Did you ever think about killing yourself?" Seth asked me. I froze, taking off guard by his question.

"Yes," I said without thinking about it. He stiffened up, and the look on his face was so tragic that it made me want to start bawling. "But I didn't. Because whenever I took that toothbrush to my mouth, or that razor to me wrists, I'd look at myself in the mirror, and I'd say, 'Am I wasting something here?' and I stopped myself. I don't know why, but I always had this feeling that I would be wasting something or other, and I stopped trying to kill myself. Death would have been an easy way out of my pain, but I decided that I needed to stick it out, and so I did. And I'm glad I did too." I slipped my hand back into his again, and I laced our fingers. My hand was getting really sweaty form all of his excess heat, but I didn't care, I was totally content. I think I needed to tell him, today. I'm not one for keeping things inside, that's for sure.

"That's good."

"Have you?" I asked him, even though he probably hasn't, from what I understood, his life before he became a werewolf was pretty decent, and now he couldn't even die, let alone kill himself.

"No. It's the most selfish thing in the world that a person can do," he told me suddenly, his dark eyes fierce. "I wouldn't want it to happen to anyone I loved, ever. I would never forgive someone who would do something like that, ever."

His eyes were latched tightly onto mine, and I couldn't find words. I just shook my head slowly up and down. I wasn't about to kill myself now of all times. "I wouldn't want anyone to go off themselves about me anyway," he told me. He was nearer to the mark than I realized. If he died, there wouldn't be anything to live for anymore.

I think that the reason that I couldn't kill myself the first time was because some small piece of me realized that there was Seth out there for me, and I was subconsciously waiting for him. But if Seth died, there was no one else out there for me.

There couldn't be.

"But what if they sacrifice themselves?" I asked suddenly, I had no earthly idea where that came from. "What if they knowingly take their own life for someone else's? Would you forgive them then?"

"That's totally different, and that won't happen to one of us anyway, so I'm not worried about it. But I just can't lose you, Sophie, ever. You don't know what it would do with me if I had to go one day without seeing your face. It would kill me," he told me, his face extremely close to mine. I was about to lean in when I saw Leah from my peripheral vision.

There were tears pouring down her face, and she didn't look the best in the world. "She didn't make it," Leah sobbed, collapsing on the ground. I began to sob into Seth's chest, and I never wanted to look back up.

**A/N: I feel like a douche, I just remembered that a heart attack was the way Harry died. So I had to re-write this a little bit. Anyway, please review and I can't believe it! 70+ reviews! That's the most I've gotten, ever!!! Thank you all so much!**


	19. Gone

Chapter Eighteen: Gone

She was gone. Sue had left my life officially. She was never coming back from the point of no return.

Leah had wanted to see her, and Seth and I obliged. I really didn't want to go see her, but I had crossed my fingers in the hope that nothing would be too bad. I had never seen a dead person before.

"Excuse me, are you family?" a doctor asked me. He was way shorter than I was, and had dark brown hair buzzed cut with annoying glasses that I just had the sudden urge to rip them off his face and bend them in half until they snapped.

I looked him straight in the eye. "I _am_ her family," I told him, looking at him so fiercely that he just backed away slowly with his hands up. Damn straight.

Sue was covered up with a white sheet, and her big toe on her left foot was sticking out slightly. She probably would have laughed if she had seen herself. But as I looked at her I wanted to cry again. But, seeing as I had just brought back my composure, I didn't. My chin wobbled again, and I had to press my lips together tightly so that I didn't make any noises.

We drove in silence back to La Push, and Leah decided to come with us. She told me that she just couldn't handle being alone tonight, and I didn't blame her. I didn't want to be alone anymore than necessary either.

I couldn't believe it, another person in my life who has left me unwillingly. It was sad really, but it was true. But this happened to people all of the time, not just myself. As I looked at Seth and Leah, I realized that Sue was loved by many, and all.

When we got back to their house, Leah immediately went into a room that I had never been into before and shut the door. The faint _click _of a lock from a door locking rang through the almost empty house.

It really wasn't the same house without Sue. The decorations were the same, and so was the color on the wall, but nothing else was the same. The cheerful, friendly atmosphere was gone, as was the entire tone of the house. Without her, everything seemed dead.

"Well, at least we can get a television now," Seth told me, his voice sounding completely calm, but I knew him well enough that there was something brewing beneath it all.

"So, Sue was the reason that you didn't get a T.V. yet?" I asked, being equally nonchalant. If this was the way that he wanted to deal with it, that would be okay with me.

"Yes, she said that they gave people brain tumors or something. Like that thing that most people have against cell phones, she had against T.V. It was beyond ridiculous."

"She was probably right."

"Probably," he told me, his eyes away from mine, looking blankly at the wall of family pictures that was directly in front of him. "This is, just so hard," he told me, his eyes just shattering my heart. He then began to sob, tears running down his face so hard that it looked like rain.

I just stood there, not knowing what do to. I was never very good with crying people, so I definitely couldn't deal with Seth. But this wasn't crying; no this was the sobbing of a man who had lost everything. I sat down on the couch next to him, rubbing his back in circles. It hurt me to see the man that I loved in so much pain, but there wasn't anything that I could do about it.

I patted his back feeling slightly worthless. I wished that there was some magic spell that could magically make the dead become alive again. I would have used it several times myself, now.

I hugged him lightly, and he gripped me back so tightly, as if he was never going to let me go, which I wouldn't mind one bit. It was a bit closer than usual, but I didn't mind. He could hold me as tight as he wanted to, whenever he wanted to.

Seth looked so awful that I just wanted to take the pain away. It wasn't fair that someone this god should have something taken away from him. What about all the serial killer, and rapists in this world? What about the people who cheat, lie, and steal every single day? Was there no justice in this shithole we call Earth?

Why Seth, why now? "Don't ever leave me," he sobbed to me, not even trying to pull himself together the way that I would have. How could he think that _I_ could ever leave _him_? It should be the other way around. I would never leave him, never stop loving him.

"I won't ever leave you; you are the one who can never leave me. If you ever left me I would die a thousand times inside, and out," I told him this and even I could hear the sincerity ringing out of my voice. He stopped cold for a second, and I felt happy. Maybe since he knew that I could never, ever leave him willingly, he would feel slightly better about all of this.

"How could you think that I could ever leave you?" he asked me, his voice surprisingly solid after all of his sobbing. "That's not how the whole imprinting thing works; I've already told you that. There is nothing that you could do to keep me away from you, no matter how many times you hurt me, no matter how many times you could push me away, and I would always be here for you Sophie. I've wanted to tell you this for a long time, but I haven't gotten the chance to. And I don't care anymore if you don't feel the same way, and I don't care if you won't want to talk to me anymore. In fact, I'll understand, I promise. I just want you to hear me out, and to never doubt what I'm about to tell you."

I couldn't breathe; I was could barely comprehend what he was saying. Was he seriously about to tell me what I thought he was going to tell me? I hoped so, but he could be telling me something different. I had to speak first, no miscommunication was going to get in my way, so help me god.

"I love you." It wasn't Seth who spoke it, even though I wanted it to be. I wanted to slap my self. How could I say that now? It was so inappropriate. Stupid, stupid, stupid move. I wanted to leave, how could I say such an audacious thing? It may have been true, but that didn't make what I had just said any easier to take.

"Oh, you don't know what you're saying, and you don't mean it," Seth told me, which pissed me off. How could he think that? "You're feeling sorry for me," he told me, which only pissed me off more.

"I am in love with you, and I am not feeling sorry for you, I don't say things like that to people if I don't mean it, you of all people should know that. I do too love you, and there's nothing you can do about it," I told him, feeling a bit immature. Why should I have to act like a five year old to convince someone of something? This was getting ridiculous.

"No you don't," he shook his head, like saying that was going to get me to believe otherwise.

"I do too," I said, being a five year old again. "I love you more than you know, you idiot. I love you because you're the nicest, friendliest, absolute _best_ person that I know. You were there for me when no one else was, and you'll always be there for me, and I know it. I won't _let _you leave me. When you're happy, I'm happy, and when you're not, I'm not. It's as simple as that. _Do not_ tell me that I don't know what love is, because I do. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you, no one has ever loved you as much as I have. I love you even when I'm infuriated with you, like right now. So you can shut the hell up and kiss me," I told him, and I threw myself at him.

I met his lips, and he kissed me back. I didn't even open my mouth; I just wanted my lips to be on his for at least a little while. It was surprisingly soft and sweet, even though I just threw myself at him. I leaned back and hoped that I wasn't being too forward, but then I realized that I didn't care all that much anymore. I just wanted him to know, and now that he finally did I was ecstatic. The only thing that I had to worry about now was the fact if he loved me back or not.

"I love you too," he told me, and even though the moment for this was horribly wrong, I felt warm, wonderful, and above all, _whole._

**A/N: Well, it took them long enough, but they finally kissed. And I know that this might not have been a long time for Sophie to tell Seth that she loves him, but she's loved him for a long time (even though she keeps lying to herself and saying she didn't) and she's not exactly one to keep things inside. Well review my loves! (Haha, that sounds really weird.)**

**Also, for my fans of **_**Breathe **_**I'm hoping to have the sequel, **_**Learning to Fall **_**up for a July 4****th**** present (I'm American)! **


	20. Dirge

Chapter Nineteen: Dirge

To say the least, the time around Sue's death was very emotional, for both Seth and me. Although we were both so happy that we finally announced our feelings for each other (I was thrilled, I mean I had been waiting for so long for someone to love me properly, and here he was), we had both lost someone very important to us.

It seemed almost ironic to me that on the day of Sue's funeral my mother was home (for once) and decided to take an interest in me.

When she saw the black dress that I was wearing (Leah decided to arrange everything, and she decided that fancy dress would be the most appropriate, since that was what her father's funeral was like) and the shoes that were in my hand she asked an obvious question. "Where are you going?" she asked. "You look like you're all dressed up; I hope you have somewhere to go." I have to admit that she surprised me by being observant that day.

"I'm going to someone's funeral that was very important to me," I answered stiffly. I couldn't believe she actually cared, I had no idea why she was even home; I didn't think that she and Derek broke up, even though that could be the case. She wouldn't be talking to me; she would probably be picking up the pieces of herself in her bedroom.

"Who was it?" she asked, and I must say that I was getting peeved. Why did she have to get all 'concerned mother' now all of a sudden?

"A very good friend of mine," I said vaguely (taking a hint from Seth and Sue), and then I heard the honking of Seth's car, thank god. I said a silent prayer of thanks.

"Wait, I want to hear more about this 'friend' of yours."

"I can't talk, I have to come early to the funeral, it's in La Push, and my ride is here, sorry mom."

She looked a bit upset, like she was going to stop me, but I ran before she could say anything. What was up with the interrogation anyway?

I didn't say anything about my mother on the way there, I didn't think it would be very smart to do that considering where we were going. I almost started to cry again, but I kept my head up high and strong. I wasn't going to crumple in front of god and everybody. Seth needed to see that I was strong (even though I wasn't), so that he could be strong too. Its amazing how our lives had suddenly been intertwined, hurt one of us, you hurt both without truly meaning to, it was just how we worked.

Leah came up to us as soon as we got there and I hugged her first. She seemed surprised that I had even touched her, but I didn't care. Since I had gotten to now Leah better than ever I figured out that we were a lot alike, in many ways.

In looks though, we were the almost complete opposite. Her hair was to her shoulders, mine was to me waist line. Her hair was dark as midnight and straight as an arrow, mine was wavy and a golden blonde color. Her eyes were extremely dark, and mine were a dark blue. We were, however, both tall, but she was far more graceful than I. She could also turn into a werewolf if she so pleased, and all I was, was just a plain old human. She was also intensely beautiful in a very exotic way, while I was more your average American girl.

She and Seth looked a lot alike, even though they were temperamentally not the same person at all. He was positive, she was a pessimist. She had a dry sense of humor; his sense of humor was far more straight forward.

I also found out that Seth had given up his dream of being a lawyer (which to me was surprising to say the least) to stay with the pack so that Leah could go to college and get away from La Push once and for all. This astonished me (I couldn't help but think of La Push as home now), but I was happy that Leah got to leave La Push, and all that had happened there. She deserved it.

But all in all I was starting to love Leah as a sister. "Are you ready to go in?" he asked me, and I nodded.

The church in La Push was a quaint little place, almost directly on the beach, since so many people wanted to get married there, Leah told me. It was small and white, with a steeple not nearly as tall as the trees. The words 'Our Father' were engraved up on top of the door, and there were a few trees blowing in the wind, which wasn't as merciless as it usually was on a cold March day like it normally, was.

It was altogether too pretty to be the day of a funeral.

I kissed Seth lightly on the lips (for moral support, of course) before everyone started to get inside the church. It was hard, seeing the black casket that we had to pick out lying there. I almost didn't make it for the viewing when we all had to go, I was bawling so badly then, having to see Sue's face lying there, knowing that she was never going to smile at me, or reprimand me for doing something so hopelessly stupid at school (or anywhere really) ever again.

The whole rest of the time, though, Seth never cried in public, and from what I've seen, except for once, I'd never seen Leah cry at all, even though she probably did sometime. It's only human.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to see off the soul of a beloved woman off into God's kingdom. Suzanne Alison Clearwater was known to all as being…" and I totally zoned out, I'm sorry to say. I didn't want to hear about how great, and holy Sue was, because I already knew that.

The whole pack was there; Sam and Emily, Jared and Kim, Jacob and Renesmee, Embry, Brady and Collin were there. Collin waved at me, and Brady gave me a small smile, which I found kind of reassuring. There was also a man there that had the average look of a werewolf sitting next to Jacob, who I assumed was Quil.

On the other side of Leah was a man that I had never seen before (I knew just about everyone on the reservation, and they all knew me, so it was very unusual to see someone there that I didn't know). He was pale, and had a receding hair line of curly brown hair, and brown eyes. He was crying tears that moved down his face in single drops.

I nudged Seth, "Who's that?" I asked. Seth looked around in question until he had found the man that I was referring to.

"That's Charlie Swan. He's the chief of police in a town called Forks, which is about twenty minutes north of here. He and Sue had a really strong bond. They were together."I had to admit that I was surprised. Why didn't Sue tell me about him herself? I found my self getting a bit angry, but then I realized that it would be awful to feel angry towards the dead, and besides, I hadn't exactly told her everything either, so I knew my anger was irrational, but it's not like it was something that I could control.

I couldn't believe the number of people in the church that were crying, but it was also unsurprising to me. Sue was obviously a very important member of the community, and everyone loved Sue. It was hard not to.

As the processional began I was swallowed by another wave of misery. How could this happen. I couldn't believe that this happens to good people, but it does. It will even happen to me one day.

It blew me off my feet to realize that I, too, would die. I couldn't believe it. I would die. But couldn't everything die, didn't we all have expiration dates? Except for werewolves, and vampires, and god knows what else that's out there.

Seth couldn't die. The words took a hit on me, I could say that much. So whenever I went in the afterlife Seth wouldn't be coming with me.

"Seth, can you die?" I asked him as I was thinking of my own mortality as we drove to the graveyard where Sue was going to be buried next to her husband, Harry. It might have been an ignorant question considering what we were doing today, but I didn't care. I desperately needed to know.

Seth didn't answer me for a while, and I wondered what he could be thinking about. "I could, if I didn't phase for a solid length of time. But when we start to phase, we age a lot. Do I look like the average nineteen year old to you?" he asked me while I looked at him properly. He really didn't, he actually looked like he was about twenty-three at average. I shook my head. "Exactly. Once we start to phase its one heck of a growths spurt. You just grow and grow and grow until you've matured fully."

Wow. that was incredible. I never thought about that before, I never really needed to. "Do you want to age?" I asked him.

"Are you going to age?"

"Well, yes, but I'm human, what do you expect me to do?"

"Well then so will I. I will get wrinkles just for you, my love," he told me, making me giggle, acting like him for the first time in a while. I think that we were going to get through this thing, which was making me happy.

I had to say that I was relieved; at least he would come down with me, wherever we went.

When we got there once again we got the front seats. It seemed like even more people were here than just the people at the church. I saw Sue's lawyer, Mr. Lewis, who wasn't there before.

"Oh, there you three are. I was supposed to give these to you when she passed. She told me to herself." I couldn't believe it. He held out three envelopes to us, each one with our name handwritten in her personal handwriting. I couldn't believe it, it's almost like she knew she was going to die. "She also said that her will was in each of these letters, and that whatever she said that you could have of hers was in this letter. I didn't read any of them, but you do need to tell the courts what she gave you, and have proof," he told us, keeping the letters in a lawyers perspective.

"Thank you," Leah told him, and then she took my arm and kept us walking. I couldn't understand it. She had handwritten these for us. It was astonishing. She was so wise and good, so it shouldn't have surprised me as much as it did, but could anyone really blame me for being flummoxed?

I decided that I would wait until Seth dropped me off before I read mine, but Leah didn't hesitate to open hers. By the time she was finished she was crying. My curiosity peaked, but I didn't want to open it just yet. Seth didn't open his either.

When they lowered her casket into the ground, I thought I was going to lose it. She was really gone, and we were never going to see her ever again. I was surprised that no one tried to jump in after the casket. I couldn't believe it myself. She was gone. On the way home, the ringing in my ears eerily sounded like a dirge.

It hurt me to be away from Seth at this moment in time, but I had to get back to the house, my mother was there for goodness's sake, and I decided that Seth and Leah deserved some alone time, without me. They deserved to mourn their mother without me.

I had no idea what to expect when I opened the letter, but it certainly wasn't this.

_Dear Sophie,_ the letter read.

_I can't imagine what you're going through right now, and I 'm sorry that I had to leave you, but it was my time, even though that sounds horribly Walt Disney. Believe me, I didn't want to leave, but I had to._

_I just wanted to tell you that you've healed so much throughout the time that I knew you, even though it wasn't just me, I have to say that I'm glad that you healed. _

_It was amazing how much the broken feelings in your eyes bothered me when I first met you, no matter how rude you were being to Seth. Because even though I could tell that you tried to hide the pain in your eyes, it didn't work very well to say the least. I could tell that you built up that wall just to keep people out, because you didn't _want_ to heal, as crazy as that sounds. _

_But that day I knew that you were special, and I was glad that my son had imprinted on you. And as I watched your relationship grow, I knew that you two were truly perfect for each other. Someone like you needs someone like him, and vise versa. You two balance out nicely. _

_I have to say that as the months went by and the pain became less and less evident in your eyes I couldn't say that I wasn't happy for you, because that would be a boldface lie. My mother always told me that whenever Seth found a girlfriend that I would be just as jealous as she was when my brothers met their wives, but I must say that I wasn't. Now, I'm sure that you can't even find that trace of pain that you could see before, even though losing me might have bothered you a just a little bit, or so I selfishly hope._

_Before Seth met you he was happy, sure, but I could tell that he wasn't entirely complete. There are an amazing number of people that are totally complete in themselves when they are alone, but Seth wasn't one of them, and neither were you, I could tell that. _

_Sophie, I don't think that you were ever destined to be alone. I think that you were going to be made just for someone else, it didn't matter who that person was really. You were always made just for someone else, and there is nothing wrong with that. I just have to say that I was glad that it was my son and not just some other schmuck out there on the street. _

_You're a very rare soul indeed, and never feel ashamed by that._

_I also must admit that I got Seth to tell me about more Peter than you did. I know you must be a bit angry about that (I never did tell you about Charlie, and for that I apologize. I too know what it's like to love more than one person at a time, even though our situations are totally different), but I had to tell you that I knew, you deserve to know that. I have to admit again that I wasn't entirely surprised, even though I would have rather gotten your version of the story rather than the heavily condensed version from my son. It hurts him to even think about you in pain, and this has to be the thing that caused the most pain that was always lurking in your eyes. _

_I also have to say that I loved you, even while you wouldn't talk to me, I loved you like a daughter the first time I saw you, and that feeling doesn't just go away by itself, and for me it never will. _

_You were like a daughter to me, and two wonderful daughters I got to have, when so many people don't even get to have any at all. I just wanted you to know that I never took you for granted. Most of my things are going to Leah and Seth, and for that I don't believe that I have to apologize. They are my son and daughter in every legal way, and therefore take more from me. I did raise them as children, as you understand. _

_But, to you, I want to give you a necklace of mine. It's nothing remotely fancy or anything, but I must say that it was one of the most important to me. My Harry gave it to me. _

_It has a gold thin chain and on the end of the chain was a dream catcher, which may seem horrible cliché because we are of Native American descent and all, but I can tell that you are the kind of person who's greatest fears, worst nightmares, and many other things that I cannot dream about knowing about come out in your mind while you are asleep. _

_It may seem very cheesy to you, but believe me, it works its purpose very well, and if I do say so myself _

_I do think it is one of the prettiest things in my sparse jewelry box. It is now yours, and I must say that I hope that you were it, and whenever you do think of this letter. It's very important to me that you even read this letter, and I must say that I hope you keep it and don't throw it away. _

_I just want you to know that all of the times you've told me about your mother that you received at least one kind of motherly love while you were on this earth._

_Love,_

_Sue_

I didn't even realize that I was crying when my tears starting falling on the paper, smudging the ink.

**A/N: So what did you think? Personally I like Sue's letter, and I can't believe we're at the nineteenth chapter, but we are. Please review! **


	21. On the Mend

Chapter Twenty: On the Mend

Things were getting better as the first days of April blew in. I began missing Sue less and less each time that I thought about her until all I got was a pleasant feeling of remembrance. I would always miss her, but time made the pain lessen just a little bit.

It was April in school, and with April came back the brightly glittered posters that screamed, '_Support you school! Come to the Junior and Senior prom! Tickets are on sale now!' _As if anyone gave a fuck, which no one did, of course.

But I was going, for some sick reason. For some reason the idea didn't repulse me half as much as it probably should have, or would have on a normal day. And besides, it would be kind of nice to have Seth there with me. It would be our first 'real' date, and that fact alone made me think about prom differently.

Besides, I like getting dressed up, and my hair done. It might be kind of fun. Thoughts like that were swirling around my head as Seth picked me up from school just like he always had.

"Would you ever consider going to prom?" I asked him as I got into his car. 

"I already told you yes when you asked me the first time," Seth told me with a duh evident in his voice. "Of course," he laughed.

"Oh yeah, I forgot." I really had. My birthday was really fun, I loved going ice skating with Seth, and it made me feel good to know that skating was something that I could share with him, even though he sucked. Horribly, but still. It was also funny to take him shopping with me, but he didn't get bored with shopping. I mean, that was a little weird, but I'll take him, even if he's kind of on the girly side.

"Is there anything new on the reservation?" I asked, looking for something to talk about, I didn't want to talk about my high school days, which I would be getting out of soon, thank the gods. Seth never got bored with me, but it made me uncomfortable to talk about it. Plus, to me school was dead boring.

"No, not really. The reservation is really quite boring when it comes right down to it, except for the occasional werewolf vampire fight that happens now and then," I was insanely worried for a second, thinking about how badly he could get hurt, and I looked alarmed into Seth's eyes.

Seth laughed at my facial expression and grabbed my hand while he was driving. I sighed, content and leaned my head against the seat of Seth's car. The feeling of his hand in mine was the most natural thing in the world to me now.

"Seth, do you ever think about going to college?" I asked him without thinking, which is something that I do all the time. I wanted to stuff the words back in my mouth. Sophie, I scolded myself, shut the hell up!

"I've thought about it for a while, but I couldn't go anywhere too far away. And, technically, I wouldn't need to go since I work towards protecting the reservation. They basically pay for everything for me, so getting a well paying job really isn't necessary." He completely missed the point, thank god.

I had been having fantasies in my head about the two of us at college together, sharing a dorm, walking to class together… the whole bit, actually. I was glad to put that to a rest, or at least that was what I was telling myself.

But Seth saw right through me, "But that's not what you're talking about, is it?" he asked.

"No, I was actually wondering if you would come to college with me. I think it would be cool to do together, and it's not like you couldn't get it. You had awesome grades, and you had high SAT scores, just like me. We could easily get into the same college together, if we wanted to. I really want some strawberries, too. They're totally not in season so it would be totally impossible to get them, but still they'd be nice too. Ooh, don't chocolate covered ones sound divine right now?" I was babbling, but I was trying to get off the subject.

He was silent for a while, and I could tell by his expression that he was heavily weighing his words with what he was about to say. I got ready for disappointment. "Um, strawberries, Soph? Really? And I think that going to college right now wouldn't be the best thing in the world right now. I mean, I still have to work on the reservation. I mean, I can't exactly leave now. I mean we just caught some fresh vampire trails, and we can't exactly ignore that…" he told me. He looked like he was going to say some other things, but I cut him off.

"Vampire trails?"I asked him. Oh shit. They couldn't be coming after me now, could they? Not now, everything was going perfect now! Oh no, no, no, no, no.

"Yes, but it doesn't seem like too many. It's kind of fun to kill vampires. Well, the bad ones at least," he tacked on as an after thought.

He thought this was _fun_? He could _die_! "We're going to investigate later today. They aren't too near La Push or any of the surrounding territory really, so we don't need to worry about them, but still it would be nice. Quil's starting to get bored."

Oh, that was good. That meant that the Volturi wouldn't be coming after all, which was comforting. I feel back into my seat again, relieved.

"Now, back to the whole college thing, before you totally spazzed out on me. I don't think that I could go to college right now. Later, certainly, but not now." I stuck out my tongue at him. I didn't spazz. I worried in a slightly frightening way.

I nodded, that seemed reasonable. I could wait a few years. It's not like I was dying to be a doctor or anything really important. I could wait too.

"Could we go to La Push today? I want to go visit Emily." Ever since Sue's funeral Emily and I had gotten to know her better than I had Leah. It was surprising to me too, how well I got along with everyone on the reservation, when I could barely stand people back in Hoquiam. Emily was extremely kind and warm. She could cook phenomenally, and she was such a cheerful little person, always having something to do to keep her tiny house immaculate.

"Sure, I told her you might be coming over later today anyway. I have to work. Embry's mom has a new boyfriend over at her house that Embry needs to meet for the first time, and I offered to take his shift" I nodded. The Quileute boys traded off every other day or so, since there were so many of them now that they could afford to do that. Sam probably would have to work too, so it would probably be just Emily and I today. Kim probably wanted to be with Jared on his day off.

Kim and I had gotten fairly close as well she was such a sweetheart. It was kind of funny how easily you could bond with someone who also got imprinted on. It was like we were all destined to be some kind of big happy family. The only other imprinted girls that I had met, but that I had yet to talk to was Renesmee and Rachel. But Rachel was on a vacation to go see her sister Rebecca down in Hawaii, and I just hadn't gotten to meet Renesmee, even though I really, _really_ wanted to.

I think she would be so interesting to meet, but every time that I mentioned it, Seth started acting kind of strange, and changed the subject as soon as he possibly could. It was like… he was uncomfortable or something, but he also told me that Edward, before he met me, was sort of like his best friend along with Brady and Collin. I couldn't imagine why he wouldn't let me go over there… but oh well. I was sure that I would meet her soon enough anyway, so it really didn't bother me all that much.

Emily's house was so adorable, it was the kind of house that if there was one for rent, I would totally rent so that I could live in La Push after high school ended. Emily was standing outside, painting the door an even brighter blue than it was before, if that was even possible. You could tell that she had just finished painting it because she was standing a little ways back with a hand on her hip looking satisfied, admiring her handy work.

"Did you just finish?" I asked as I walked up to her. Seth had just turned around towards the woods after giving me a kiss on the lips that made my lips tingle. He started running, seeming to vibrate as he went.

She nodded, still smiling at her results. "Yeah, it took me forever too. Now I have to go do wedding arrangements," she told me with a sigh. It was obvious that she wasn't having much fun.

"You and Sam aren't married yet?" I asked, surprised. Seth had told me that Sam had proposed to her a while back.

"Well, we were going to get married earlier, but then he got into some mess with vampires, and we decided to post pone everything. But we've," she smiled sheepishly, "okay; _I've_ been putting it off. But I'm ready now, and Sam's been ready. I think everything is going to be perfect. I hope. Oh, won't you be one of the bridesmaids? I want all of us 'wolf girls' to be in it." Emily grinned at me and I nodded.

"Who's the maid of honor?" I asked.

"Kim, but I probably should have asked Rachel. She can organize anything and everything," Emily rolled her eyes. "Now I have to figure out who I'm going to invite, and all that jazz. It's hard when you have such a huge family." I had a feeling that she wasn't talking about her cousins and stuff; I had a feeling that she was talking about the wolves. I felt the sharp pain of jealously, it wasn't fair that she got to know them better than I did.

I mean, I talked to Collin and Brady a few times, and Seth was a no brainer, but not everyone else, not since the funeral.

"We're having another engagement party in a few weeks, when it gets warmer. You should come; I think that Jacob's pack is coming too."

I nodded. I was coming; there was no need to worry about that. We began to talk about other things as we did the dishes together, but it wasn't like she had any. Her house was way cleaner than mine would be if I was in the same situation.

I felt a pair of arms come around me and I smiled, Seth was back.

The drive home seemed much faster than it normally did. I wished that school was out already, so that I could go live in La Push. I had more than enough money since mom's job paid so well. I could probably buy a small island if I so chose.

"Seth, what would you say if I asked to live with you?" It was a hard question to ask, but I needed to know. Seth didn't even sleep over that often, and we didn't do more than kiss. Moving in together would be a big step, but I think that we were mature enough to handle it.

"I don't know. You were just saying that you wanted a house like Emily's the other day. That sounds like a good arrangement to me." He was _so _trying to get off the subject, but I wasn't letting him off the hook as easy as I had the first time.

"That would be good, but you never even stay over here! I mean, my mom is never at home anyway, we always have the house to ourselves. If you can't even stay over here, how am I supposed to know that you'll stay over in La Push?"

"How about I stay over here more often?" he asked, trying to compromise with me. It was working to an extent, and maybe I could rent out Emily's old house, if she and Sam were renting it out by the time I could rent it.

"That sounds fine, though you have to stay tonight," I announced to him, and then I kissed him, harder than usual.

He responded enthusiastically, more enthusiastically than usual, probably to get my mind off the whole moving in with him thing. I wasn't complaining. He kissed me suddenly, and I obliged. I opened my mouth, and he slipped his tongue in, and then our tongues wrestled for a little bit before I tugged on his bottom lip gently with my teeth. I heard him moan before he pulled away.

There were questions in my eyes, but he didn't offer any sort of explanation, and I wasn't complaining. He rarely kissed me like that, but I didn't know why not. It's not exactly like I'm pure or anything…

I took his hand and pulled him up the stairs to my bedroom and lied down on my bed. He came behind me and put his arms around me. I turned around to face him, I needed to see him.

"Seth, I love you," I told him, and he smiled at me serenely. I loved the way the words just slipped off my tongue, the way they just felt so natural. It felt good to say them too, like relief.

"I love you too. I'll always love you," he told me, and with those words I was content. I only needed him and my life was complete.

If only I knew how soon it would be before that peace shattered.

**A/N: Ugh, I can't write fluff to save my life. And can you say **_**foreshadowing**_**? Please review!**

**Yes, and I'd like to apologize for not updating in a while. **

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	22. Dreaming Nightmares

Chapter Twenty One: Dreaming Nightmares

I smiled, and let the water glide through my fingers. I loved the beach at La Push. Who didn't? The view was spectacular, the water was warm, and the sand wasn't as grainy. It was also the place that I officially fell in love with Seth.

The water suddenly became ice cold, though, and the temperature made me have goose bumps. I shivered slightly and looked around, wondering what could make the water of the whole beach become so cold. I looked up and swiftly wanted to look back down again. How could they be here? No, no, no. This wasn't supposed to happen; this wasn't part of the plan.

_They_ were here. Couldn't they just go away? Maybe if I asked them to leave and never come back they wouldn't. Yeah, right.

I woke up, drenched with sweat. Why was it that every time Seth was over I had a nightmare? That probably wasn't going to make him want to come over anymore. I took a deep breath. In and out, nice and slow. I laid in bed for several more minutes, trying to calm down my racing heart. I was pretty sure that Seth could hear my heart beat, and he would probably be worried that my heart was racing when I woke up.

I decided to slide down the banister (something that I haven't done since, well ever), to be caught by Seth at the foot of the stairs.

"Good morning," he told me with a grin, his white teeth blinding me. I kissed him quickly, and slid out of his arms, afraid of having morning breath. God knows what that smells like.

"Good morning to you as well. What's for breakfast?" I asked, and laughed as Seth's eyebrows pulled together, making him look confused.

"I didn't know you ate breakfast. I'll make you something, though. I'm not that bad of a cook, actually."

"Nah, it's okay. I just wanted to watch you sweat." I poured myself some Honey Bunches of Oats with milk and sat down at the table across from Seth. He never ate at my house, even though I told him many times that there was food enough to spare. He said that he didn't want to force himself on me, whatever that meant.

As I looked at him I decided that he had to be one of the best things that I had ever looked at. "You're beautiful," Seth quipped from across the table.

I felt my cheeks get warm. "Your stupid," I laughed, "if you think that I'm going to believe that shit. That is total BS."

"How would you know?"

"Because I know boys. They always say things like that to girls, but they never mean them. Especially when they are talking to their girlfriends. Believe me, I know my stuff," I proclaimed proudly.

"So all boys are like this?"

"Within reason, yes. They couldn't all be like that, or else they wouldn't be married, but still."

"So you think that I would lie to you?"

"You lied to me about being a werewolf," I reminded him.

"No, I just didn't tell you the whole truth. There is a total difference between the two."

"Whatever. Not telling someone the whole truth has to be a total lie, and you now I'm right."

"True, but believe me when I say that I think you are the most beautiful thing that I have ever seen in my life," Seth told me with a grin, and the crazy thing is that I smiled back. I believed him.

"And you are the stupidest person that I have ever met, but I love you anyway."

"You would be nothing without me," he told me with a mock accent, and I laughed at the statement that was so true that it wasn't even funny. He was my life.

"I love you," I reminded him.

"I love you too. But this is getting icky. How are you supposed to eat if your being all gooey and mushy on me?"

"Don't watch then."

"What are we doing today?" I asked, turning more serious. Seth had almost totally distracted me from my nightmare, I almost forgot it entirely, but then again I never really forgot nightmares.

"Well, would you mind going over to La Push today? The pack's found a trail again, and it is the same vampires. They smell familiar, which worries Jacob a little." It must be really bad if Jacob is worried. From what I understood, Jacob rarely got worried.

"I don't mind." It would be better than staying over here by my self. If I was left by myself I had the greater chance of making myself go insane with worry, making myself be afraid that he wouldn't come back to me...

I _really _needed someone else with me. "Good," Seth smiled at me. "Rachel has been dying to meet you after Emily told her how awesome you were."

I laughed. "I'm pretty sure that Emily didn't tell her that I was 'awesome', but whatever you want to believe. Will Kim be there too?" I asked.

"Yeah, they always stay at Emily's house together whenever both the packs have to join together. Lately even Nessie's been going over there too. Kim told me that it's because it helps them all cope, whatever that means. We're going to be fine, I promise."

I rolled my eyes. How could they be so confident about something that wasn't precisely certain? They were ridiculous. "Be safe," I told him, my voice cracking on the last syllable.

"Don't worry," Seth told me, "I always am."

~*~*~*~

Seth had already dropped me off an hour before and I was going crazy. I kept pacing the length of Emily's little house, and had begun counting the number of steps it took to go back and forth, back and forth.

_Two hundred and eighty seven, two hundred and eighty eight, two hundred and eight nine._

"First time?" I could hear Rachel, Paul's imprint, murmured almost silently. I could tell that my behavior freaked her out, but I was so worried I couldn't introduce my self properly, let alone be charming.

"Yes," I heard Kim whisper back, sounding almost pitiful. It was sad really, all of us stuck in this house, not knowing if the person that we loved the most in the world was going to come home or not.

"I hate this part," Rachel said loudly from the kitchen. The other parts of our loves being a werewolf we've all learned to deal with, but this was just too much. At least we had each other. I walked into the kitchen to see what everyone else was doing. I couldn't stand being separated from someone else right now. I needed to see someone else suffering as much as I was, as bad as that sounds.

Emily was standing on a chair, getting a mixing bowl from the top shelf. "Come on, let's make something for _all _of them to eat when they come home," she said, her voice sounding cheery, even as she emphasized the all in her sentence. She was always like that, looking at the bright side of things. Stupid optimism.

"Where's Renesmee?" I asked since she wasn't in the kitchen, and Seth had said she was coming, didn't he?

"Oh, she's in the other room. She's a little shy and she still hasn't warmed up to us yet," Rachel made this sound like the weirdest thing ever, but I could understand that. Everyone on the reservation seemed like such a family, especially the packs of werewolves that were running around.

"You know," Kim remarked, "I really need to get your chocolate chip sheet cake recipe for our cookbook. I mean, I know it's not exactly low fat or anything, but I'm sure Debra can find an alternative for all the fattening things."

"Okay, that's sounds okay with me, but do you want the kind with nuts or without?" Emily asked.

"Your making a cookbook?" I asked, not really trying to make an effort to sound not surprised. "What for?" Maybe they were making a big thing for the entire reservation or something, I don't know.

"Well a few years back, I was bulimic and me and my stepmother, Debra, run a place here in town for girls with eating disorders, or really for anyone who needs help with their eating habits. See, I'm a dietitian, and we want to make a cookbook full of good stuff to eat that's healthy." Wow, I didn't know that and I have to admit that I was impressed.

"Wow," I said and Kim shrugged.

"It's really not that big of a deal, we're just going to have a local publisher publish it and everything," she told me. "Can we have both? I'm sure some people that we're giving these books to are either allergic to nuts or don't like them."

They continued to talk about recipes and comparing them and eventually even Rachel joined in. I have to admit that I was kind of bored, I mean I know I was only in high school, but to me a home cooked meal is a cold cut sandwich with chips and a coke. I can cook about as many things as the tree outside my window can.

I started to walk all around Emily's house again, going outside. I didn't know if this was a no-no (it probably was, considering how safe the werewolves liked their imprints to be) and saw the same girl that I saw from the hospital again who I now knew was Renesmee. She was still looked pretty, but she looked more unhappy now. "I hate being away from him," she told me suddenly, as though she could sense me there. "It bothers me more than anything else in the world." I had to agree so I nodded and sat down beside her.

"Are you really... are you really half vampire?" I asked boldly, even scaring myself a little. You can't just ask questions like that to people.

Renesmee smiled and said, "Yes, I am. It's amazing how often I get asked that question, considering how everything about my family is supposed to be a secret."

"I'm sure you've heard the love story of my parents too, everyone here has." I nodded again.

"Something like what happened to your mother happened to me too. I also fell in love with a vampire, but we didn't exactly have a happy ending. He's dead now," my voice softens at the end and Renesmee looks at my sympathetically. It was so much easier to talk about him now, it didn't even hurt anymore.

I have to admit that I was surprised by how young she was, it shocks me every time she speaks, her words are so mature and wise. They just sound so weird coming from a ten year old. "It must have happened for a reason, everything does. Would you have found Seth if he had lived?"

"No, but that doesn't make it any easier to live with. But I couldn't imagine living without him now."

"Exactly, see, everything does happen for a reason, even if you can't see it." Wow, a ten year old was telling me something like that. It made me feel really stupid and ridiculous.

"How old are you?" I asked.

"I'm three." Wow, a three year old giving me advice. Now I just felt retarded.

"You're really smart to be three years old," I told her and she laughed.

"Yeah, I tend to get that a lot."

We started talking about everything under the sun, and I was surprised to admit that we had a lot in common. She told me a lot of interesting stories about her life as of now, and of Jacob. We laughed a lot that afternoon. I was having more fun with her than I had in a while, and I was surprised.

The pack came home when the sun set, and Nessie and I went to go alert everyone. We instantly all got perked up, and started talking excitedly.

They were home! Euphoria swept through me, and when they all came inside half naked I went and jumped into Seth's arms and kissed him unthinkingly. Everyone started chuckling, and I pulled away from Seth bright red, and he laughed at me and kissed my forehead.

"Wow Kim," Emily chortled from the other side of the room, "they're almost as bad as you and Jared." We all started laughing again, and the attention was off of us.

"I missed you," I whispered to Seth, and he chuckled again.

"Really? I couldn't tell." Haha, very funny. Smart ass.

Nessie and Jacob were talking in a corner, away from everyone else. She was bent over laughing, and the way Jacob looked at her was a beautiful thing to see. It was such a pure look of awe that it put a lump in my throat. I looked away at Seth and he became concerned. "Are you okay?" he asked me.

"I"m fine," I assured him, and I was amazed when I saw the same look that was Jacob's face in Seth's. It hurt my heart a little bit. God, I was turning into a cheese ball.

"Are you ready to eat?" I heard Emily call from the kitchen, and the enthusiastic exclamations from the surrounding werewolves made me laugh again. Seth grabbed my hand and we went to go eat with our family.

**A/N: The drama's coming up shortly, don't worry. I Sophie and Seth to have some good times before everything goes sour! Anyway, before the next chapter, can please get eight reviews before I post the next chapter? Please? I wouldn't ask this normally, but I want to get to 100 reviews. I know at least I have eight of you on story alert, so please do! **

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	23. Renesmee

Chapter Twenty Two: Renesmee

I couldn't believe that I was going through this. I just could not believe it. I refuse to believe it.

I was going for a spa day with Renesmee, and then _we_ were going to go get ready for _my_ prom, even though she wasn't going. This just couldn't be happening.

"You know your going to have fun," Nessie chirped at me while I was begging her to reconsider. I should have known that something like this was going to happen, evidently most of the Cullen family was big on shopping.

"Maybe, but I highly doubt that Ness." I'm not one to shop, usually, but Nessie and Seth always made me seem to think about shopping differently, even though I _really_ don't want to.

"Well, just so you know, Aunt Alice and I picked out your dress!"

"So, you're telling me that I don't get to pick out my own dress?"

Nessie giggled. "Exactly!" Fabulous.

I wasn't worried though, even though I could be if I wanted to. Alice (from what I've heard from Nessie, anyway, I've never met her) has excellent taste, and so does Nessie for that matter.

I also had tried the "I probably won't be able to pay you back." route (the Cullen family had expensive taste), but Nessie brushed that thought off without a second thought.

"Trust me, we have more than enough money for a prom dress. Aunt Alice even bought my mother's when she went. Don't worry about it."

What I really was planning to do for my prom was to go in sneakers and jeans just to piss off the chaperons and all of the other kids, but I didn't even bother mentioning that to Nessie. She would probably have bit my head off if I had even given her any hint of my real intentions. "That's not what ordinary people would do, Sophie!" she'd scream at me.

It made me feel bad that she was paying for everything, but I didn't feel too guilty. Once Nessie got started, she didn't stop.

I walked into the spa that Nessie had told me to meet her at with a wary expression on my face. Could you blame me? They were probably going to put me through torture by aroma therapy.

"Sophie!" Nessie squealed, and came up straightaway to hug me enthusiastically.

"Hey," I told her, hugging her back. She was acting like she hadn't talked to me in months, when I had just talked to her on the phone about five days ago.

"Okay, we've got the whole day planned out."

"We?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. Did she really think that I had anything to do with this?

"Okay, _I've_ got this whole thing planned out. No need to be so touchy, Sophie. Anyway, we are going to get a massage, and then a facial. After that we are going to go get our hair, make-up, and nails done, and then you are going to go see you dress, finally, and then you're going to go to the prom and meet Seth there."

"And, what are you and Jacob going to do while Seth and I go to prom? Since we are both getting these things done to us."

"That is for me to know, and you not find out. Anyway, are you excited?"

_No_, I grumbled internally, but I didn't say anything, besides, this couldn't be too bad, could it?

***

It turned out it wasn't bad. At all. In fact, it was strangely enjoyable. "Ah, this feels so good," I told Nessie as a masseuse worked his magic on my back. "This must be what heaven feels like."

Nessie giggled. "I told you you would have fun, didn't I? Who is always right?" she asked, making me grin.

"You the all knowing goddess."

"That's right! Anyway, where are you and Seth going after prom?"

Oh, God. I had no idea. His house was obviously out of the equation, and my mom might be home tonight, as odd as that sounded. "Um, I have no idea, actually."

"Why don't you come meet Jacob and I at my house! My mom has been dying to meet you."

"Really?" I was confused. Why would Nessie's mom want to meet me?

"Really. She has to make sure you are 'suitable enough to be her daughter's friend', or something." Nessie rolled her eyes, but I could tell she was serious. "I told her I was capable of making good choices about my friends, but she doesn't listen."

"Oh," I said, thinking of all the things I've done in the past, and I wonder if her mom would find me 'suitable'. I mean, Sue did, but that was completely different. Well, maybe not, but I could tell that this crowd was going to be tougher. "Well, you do look like your twelve."

"Yeah, but you don't see me going around acting like I'm twelve years old, do you?" she asked indigently.

I shook my head, but then a sudden thought came to me.

"What if they don't like me?" I asked, I could feel myself getting tense, and the masseuse reprimanded me, telling me to relax.

"Oh, shut up," I told him, "I'm talking."

"See," Nessie told me, grinning at my outburst, "they'll love you."

I wasn't so sure, but I didn't see what to point of arguing with her would be for. She would just win anyway.

"Okay, facials next!"

I nodded again, eager. This was more fun than I had thought.

When it was time to get my hair done, Nessie went up to the hairdresser and started whispering to him. "Okay, Ms. Sullivan. We're going to put your back to the mirror, like you requested. When we are done you will see the full results of Marilyn and my work."

"What, I didn't request anything like that..." and then it struck me. Nessie did this on purpose. Oh. I stuck my tongue out to her, and she giggled. Fine, she could be like this, even though I had wanted to see it all done... not that Nessie had known that. She probably thought that I would be difficult.

After they were done messing with my hair and putting crap on my face they turned me around, and I was stunned.

I looked gorgeous.

My hair was all piled on the top of my head, with some kind of shiny headband type thing to make it look like it was pulled back. My face looked prettier than I had ever seen it, smooth and even, free of flaws, or so it seemed. My eyes looked bluer, my lips fuller, and my nose smaller all in one swoop.

I never looked better. This was a totally different thing than just eyeliner and mascara with jeans.

"Wow," I whispered in awe. I reached up to touch my hair when Renesmee slapped away my hand.

"Nope! No touchy!" I turned to look at Nessie.

She didn't look like she was twelve anymore. She didn't have as much make-up on as I did, but she did have some. Her eyelashes looked even fuller than normal, and her hair was blown out to be shiner than the floor, and it was straight, something that I had never seen before on her. She looked like she was at least sixteen. Her lips were luscious and full, and I could see myself in them. But the first thing she did was sequel as soon as she looked at me.

"I knew it! I knew this place would work it's magic on you!"

"On _me_? No, more like on you. You look at least sixteen Nessie!" I exclaimed, and she blushed.

"Enough about me, let's see your dress." Out of nowhere a black dress bag suddenly materialized in Nessie's hands. She unzipped it and the most beautiful thing that I had ever seen came out.

The dress was light blue with a fitted bodice with beading around the sweetheart neckline, a cluster of the same beading was at the hip, and the skirt was slightly layered and short, which was perfect for me. **(A/N: Picture on profile. And please, please go look at it, because it is hard to explain, and I spent **_**hours**_** looking for the prom dress that would be perfect for Sophie!) **

I gasped, and Nessie looked pleased at my reaction. "So do you like it?" she asked, her eyes shining.

"I love it!" I went up to hug her, and she laughed and told me not to mess up my hair.

I went to go try it on, and the satin was cool and comfortable on my skin. The dress went perfectly with the silver open toed high heels.

"Knock out!" the hairdresser cat called as I walked out. "I would go for you, if I was playing for your team," he told me, which made me giggle.

Nessie linked her arm with mine. "Okay," she told me, "you're going to go to the prom now, and Jacob told me to tell you ,that Seth said to tell you, that he said that you were going to meet him in front of the hotel and that he has your ticket, because you left it at his house."

"In plain English, please," I asked, just to razz with her.

"You're going to meet Seth in front of the hotel, and Seth has your ticket. Now, go!"

Suddenly a white limo appeared, and Renesmee gestured wildly towards it, and off I went smiling the whole way.

Who would have ever thought, me going to prom.

**A/N: So, what did you guys think? Did you like it? I'm very sorry that it was kind of short, though. I promise that the next chapter will be a bit more exciting, you just wait, we're not too far off the new drama now. Well, please review! **

**Oh, and please, please look at the dress, I'm not sure if I described it properly, even though I tried. (I also looked for hours for that stupid dress, so please do!)**

**I am so freaking sorry for taking so long to update. I've been at two-a-days, which is basically where I go work out for five hours a day. So basically I have no time between that and eating and sleeping. I'm sorry, but updates aren't going to be that often.  
**

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	24. Prom Night

Chapter Twenty Three: Prom Night

I couldn't believe it. I was at prom.

This was so surreal to me that I could scarcely believe it myself, and here I was.

The lights that were coming from the gym were almost blinding, and I was standing right in front of the hotel waiting for Seth.

It was magical, as cliché as that sounds. Prom night wasn't supposed to be like this.

It was starting to get cold though, and I put my arms around myself to try to get warmer. Why didn't this dress have sleeves? Why didn't I bring a jacket?

I was starting to get worried, maybe Seth wasn't coming. What would I do if he wasn't coming, I didn't have any money, and Seth had our tickets. I wasn't about to go by myself anyway. I was about to go walk to the nearest convenience store and see if I could use their phone when a warm pair of strong arms enveloped me around my waist.

"Seth," I sighed leaning back. "Finally, where the hell were you?" I asked him turning around and giving him a warm kiss. His hair was wet and everywhere, and the top two buttons of his shirt where undone. He wasn't wearing a tux, instead he was wearing an black over sized sport coat, and a nice white button up shirt and a tie. But I didn't care, to me he looked perfect.

"Sorry, but we had some business to attend to. We found some more vampire trails, the same ones in fact, but we can't seem to find them anywhere. They've killed three men at Port Angles, and we were trying to figure out where they were," Seth told me this all in one breath, trying to fit as many words as possible in. "Don't be mad," he begged me, and I was taken aback.

"I'm not mad, what made you think that I was mad at you? You had a perfectly okay excuse, whatever, it's not a big deal. It's just prom."

While I was talking it seemed like Seth wasn't listening to what I was saying anymore. He just kept staring at me until I snapped. "What's your problem. Wait, I don't have something on my face do I? Oh my _God_ I do have something on my face, don't I?" I began freaking out since I took his silence as affirmation.

"No, you just look..." he seemed to struggle for the right word, "resplendent."

"What's that supposed to me?" I asked putting a hand on my hip.

"Bright, beautiful," he answered before kissing me again.

"You are such a loser. Who actually uses big words like that? C'mon sucker. Let's go do this thing," I told him while I dragged him inside with one hand.

I was pleased to see that Shane wasn't there, thank god. I did not want to face him, especially with Seth, there's no telling what he might do. I mean, honestly, Shane is a dick head.

I did see Amy Adams and I waved. She looked so shocked it was funny. Flies were probably going get caught in her mouth if she wasn't careful.

"OK boys and girls, get your partner and swing them round and round." Our DJ was the principal. Seriously? That was just nasty!

Seth looked like he was holding in a laugh, and I hit him (softly, not like last time, that really hurt!). He didn't need to be rude. Okay, so I wanted to laugh too, so what? At least I was _trying _to be polite.

Everyone just kind of looked at each other with eyebrows raised, and a few even went as far heading towards the door before Mr. Keen said "Just kidding," and handed the microphone to the real DJ. Everyone in the hotel exhaled.

"Let's get the party started!" the DJ shouted and made the normal noises that a DJ at prom was supposed to say. Everyone started to dance, and I pulled Seth to the dance floor.

"Since we're here, let's party! C'mon Seth, you know you want to." Seth rolled his eyes but obliged with a smile as I continued to razz him about his dancing abilities.

To put it mildly, we sucked at fast dances. We were awful, and we had no idea what we were doing. But we were also laughing our asses off, so it was worth it, but not worth it to keep on embarrassing ourselves in front of everybody.

We decided unanimously to sit down after the first dance until they played a slow song.

"So, what did you think of prom?" he asked me after we sat down at the table the farthest from the dance floor.

"That it's stupid. But, it was an excuse to get really dressed up and to dance for no reason. Besides, how else would Nessie get her fun?"

"Nessie did this to you?" Seth gestured at me, obviously thinking about the change in my looks, at least for tonight.

"Yeah, if I had my way I would be wearing jeans and a t-shirt."

"Seriously?" Seth raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously. But it was fun this way too," I smiled at him. "All the lights, and the make-up, and tuxes. Gee, what else could a woman want?"

"How about a nineteen year old werewolf that has mad dance skills," we started laughing again at that, making all the people at the surrounding tables look at us like we were loopy. I flicked all of them off which made them look away, shocked, and Seth laugh.

"God, have you ever heard the phrase, 'You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar'?" he asked me, his eyes crinkling.

"Who cares about flies anyway? They carry diseases anyway," I asked, which made him laugh harder.

"You need better social skills."

"And you need to shut up."

We smiled at each other, lingering in the moment of two beautiful people at a fancy dress party. For a second I could see us at another party just like this one in another life. And then just like that the moment was gone.

"Do you want to come dance again? It sounds like a slow song is on," he held out his hand, and I not so gracefully get up; somehow my chair ending up falling on the floor.

Seth started snickering and I glared at him. "Shut up asshole," I whispered, but of course, with his stupid super human hearing he heard me.

"What was that my dear," his eyebrows were raised and his hand was cupping his ear.

"Nothing, let's just go and get this over with."

The song playing was Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls, which happened to be one of my favorite songs. I leaned into Seth's chest, and he put his hand on my back. He was so warm and I had to look at his face again. When I did I saw something behind me.

It was a girl, but not the kind of girl that you see every day. She was tiny, she looked like she was about fourteen, and I had seen that wide eyed, full lipped face before, I was sure of it. I tried to look closer, but then she was gone.

Seth had stopped dancing. "Do you smell something funny?" he asked me, his nose scrunched up.

"No... should I?"

"I smell something strange. It smells kind of like... vampire. I want to check it out, but..." he trailed off, looking around the dance floor, but not seeing anything amiss.

"It's probably just all of the perfume, I mean, there are a lot of people here. Hundreds probably."

"Maybe, but this whole thing just seems kind of weird. I swear I've smelt that before. It burns."

"Seth, will you go get me some punch, I don't want to dance anymore," I invented wildly so he wouldn't go looking for vampires. Lord knows what he would do, and I didn't think that this was going to be pretty.

Why did this have to come back and bite me?

Shit!

"Um... sure," he looked confused, but he dutifully went to the punch table to go get me what I wanted, which evidently was punch.

As I neared the edge of the dance floor, I saw her again. Suddenly I remembered who the angel faced girl was.

One of the Volturi.

She looked at me once again in her prom dress, red eyes glowing, and then smiled.

I couldn't think anymore, I just felt the white searing pain. It was all I could see, it blinded me so that I saw white. My knees gave out, and my head was about to explode. I couldn't do anything but feel the pain, there was no way to get rid of it.

Then she, and the pain, were gone. I heard several people protest, and Seth crouched over me. "Sophie, Sophie, are you okay? Jesus, Sophie, talk to me! Do I need to call somebody," his face was right next to mine.

"I'm fine, I just need help getting back to our table, then I'll explain." I couldn't think of anything to tell him, I didn't want him to know about the Volturi, not yet! Please, why can't they leave me alone?

Seth helped me back to the table and I collapsed in the chair. God, I was exhausted, and all I had done was feel supernatural powers in my mind almost killing me. I shouldn't be tired from that!

Then I saw the girl again and I flinched. "What?" Seth was whirling around, trying to find the danger that was right in front of us.

Oh, please don't see it, please don't see her, please don't see her.

At the same time Seth found her, and she was joined by three other vampires.

"Sophie," she smiled, and then she was gone.

Seth went after her, forgetting about me for a second before he came back.

"What. The hell. Was that?" he asked, searching my face for my explanation.

I couldn't help it, I started to cry.

**A/N: I apologize for this being so short, but I wanted it to happen like this, and it didn't take as many words as normal. Anyway, you guys know the drill, review please!**


	25. They're Back!

Chapter Twenty Four: They're Back!

"Sophie, what's wrong, how do they know you?" his arms were wrapped around me, and we were back in his car after he had taken me away from the hotel ballroom rapidly.

"Nothing," I managed to choke out, after breathing hard for a while. I was having a panic attack, and it wasn't pretty.

"That's a lie and you know it. How do they know you?" Seth asked again. "Whoa, are you okay?" he suddenly exclaims, because I stop breathing.

"Breathe! Breathe! Here, let me get you something," he fumbles around his car until he gets a brown paper bag, which he hands to me and I inhale and exhale rapidly until I can breathe like a normal person again.

"They know me from Peter. I didn't tell you the whole story..." as I explained that they had been waiting to see if they were going to turn me or not... and how the answer was probably not. As I explained all of this as gently as I could Seth's jaw kept getting tighter and tighter until I was afraid that it was going to snap off.

"Why didn't you tell me? I, we, could have helped you. We would have kept you safe. We wondered who we were on the trail for, but we never thought that it could happen to one of the imprints..." all of a sudden Seth hits the wheel of the car so hard that it brakes. "Damn it!" I had never seen him so much as cuss, and soon all of this seemed to be too much.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want you to worry. I didn't even want you to know. I didn't think they would come back, ever. I'm so, so sorry."

"No, I am. I shouldn't have gotten so angry." When he moved his hand I noticed that he left a dent on the steering wheel. Shit.

But he had every reason to get angry. I lied. I lied big time. If Seth had ever lied to me like that I don't know what I could have done. Seth suddenly started speeding. "Where are we going?" I just had to ask.

"We're going over to the Cullen's. We have to tell your new information to Jacob. He'll know what to do with it." I couldn't believe it. This must have been a bigger deal than I had thought. Okay, scratch that. This was a _huge _freaking deal.

"I'm scared," I squeaked out after about ten minutes of silence.

Seth looked over at me, and for the first time since I had told him that the Volturi were coming after me I saw softness in his eyes. "I won't let them get to you. I won't." I had a feeling that he wasn't talking to me anymore. I reached over and squeezed his hand, and then leaned my head back against the seat.

Who knew that prom could be such a horrible experience? I mean, I wasn't expecting it to be all that much fun, but I was hoping that it would turn out a little bit better than it did. It wasn't supposed to turn out like this. I mean, sure sometimes people broke up on prom night, but hopefully we wouldn't.

Hopefully.

With this thought in my mind I said, "What do you think is going to happen now?"

"Nothing, as of yet. But we will find them, and we will kill them. End of story."  
"But you can't kill them!" Just thinking of Seth in close proximity with one of them made me want to gag. Something like that _couldn't _happen, not just because of me.

"Oh yeah, we can. We can and we will."

"I won't let you!"

"How are you planning to stop us? Are you going to use your super human abilities. Jacob will agree that killing them will be the right thing to do." It was alarming to me how we could get into arguments like this, but all the same I didn't want to be the one to have to stop it.

"Have you fought them before?"

"Well... we didn't really fight. But all the same this time we will. And they're is nothing that you can do to stop us." There wasn't. I couldn't possibly physically stop them, they would all laugh and then push me out of the way.

"Why don't you just not try to? Maybe they'll just leave me alone," I turned in my seat so that I was facing him.

"I doubt that, Sophie. I mean, they singled you out at your high school prom. Don't tell me that they do that for everyone. I would have thought that they might have forgotten about you by now, I mean, from they way Edward talked that probably should have been the case."

"Nope, I was too important, I know too many secrets."

"Well, they aren't taking you away from me. Ever."

"We've established that." Why was I being so bitchy? I bit my lip, we shouldn't be arguing like this.

"What's your problem?" Seth asked me.

"What's _my _problem, what's _my _fucking problem? I'm not the one who is being all... weird!"

"I want to protect you. I love you, you know that," all it took was Seth's broken whisper and I was back to being myself again.

"I'm sorry, we shouldn't be arguing like this."

"No, we're being ridiculous. We shouldn't be acting like this, but the sad thing is that we are. It's just after everything I can't stand to lose you."

"I know." Suddenly a huge house loomed in front of us. It really was a beautiful house, but I was suddenly afraid of what was inside.

"So..." Seth said to clear the tension. "Are you going to tell Jake, or am I?"

**A/N: Okay, I am super sorry for the shortness of this chapter, and the crappy quality, but you guys really need an update, and this was all I had for this chapter. I was going to make it way longer, but I figured y'all had waited long enough and deserved this one. The next one will be longer, I promise.**

**I'm not even going to ask for reviews, because this chapter is really suckish.**

**I'm sorry.**

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	26. The Cullen's

Chapter Twenty Five: The Cullen's

I couldn't help myself. I gulped. "Is this going to be a really bad thing?" I asked, my voice wavering.

"No, why would you think that?"

Oh no reason. Just the fact that I've been lying for months and I feel like shit for doing that to you guys. Oh, and also because Jacob could kill me in two seconds, as well as the six other vampires in the house. No reason at all. "Never mind," I say, because it's the easy thing to say.

"Okay." Seth shrugs, clearly not wanting to get into any more arguments.

I grab onto Seth's hand as if it is a lifeline. I can't believe I'm about to do this. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

I can.

I take a deep breath and let Seth lead me inside the house, which he enters without knocking, while he squeezes my hand.

We walk into the beautiful house, and it's not like I thought it would be at all. It's open and very pretty, with light colors along the walls. Everyone turns and looks, and they look surprised when they notice that I'm with Seth, and then suddenly they look enraged. I suddenly feel shy, which is something that I almost never have felt before in my life, but it's almost impossible not to when the most beautiful people that you have ever seen in your life, _ever_, (as well as the most deadly) are looking at you like they're going to rip your head off.

"Um, I guess Edward filled you all in, huh," Seth says with a nervous smile. I've never seen him look like that before, ever.

"Yes, we heard you two outside," a bronze haired vampire says, but then he sighs and stops looking at me and turns around.

"Sophie!" Nessie squeals, either oblivious to the tension in the room, or just ignores it. I hug her as she practically attacks me, deciding to give into her distraction. All of a sudden I hear the words, _Shut up_, but I know that she didn't talk out loud, because I didn't hear the words as much as sense them.

_What the hell?!? _I try to pull away, but Nessie's super strength won't let me go so easily. _Just let me handle this, I don't think that you'll be able to say anything anyway. You're absolutely petrified. _I hear her laughter, and I think that this is the weirdest thing that I have ever experienced in my life, including the time that I jumped on Jello.

Nessie suddenly lets me go and I look at her. She's almost as dressed up as I was, but also more casually. She has a short sparkly brown dress on and bronze flats. She looks lovely, so she probably was out tonight. Thank God she's here, I would probably pass out without another friendly face.

Behind her, looking directly at Seth and completely ignoring me, is the man that Seth had pointed out as Jacob. He didn't look exactly happy, but he didn't look completely angry either. He just looked like he was trying to asses the situation.

"You know she didn't mean it," Nessie pleads, clasping her hands together, and looks at Jacob and her father. "I know what she did, but honestly do you really think that she's the true reason that they even came over here. Think about it. She's just a normal human girl that they could have killed at her prom." At the mention of my death Seth stiffens up, which makes me decide to keep my face stoic. I didn't want to die, or become a vampire. Not anymore. "You all know that they are coming back for us, the Cullen's, anyway. She just happens to be in the way, and a reasonable excuse."

"That's true," the shorter blonde vampire says, "we need to bring in everybody again, but there isn't time. They're here in Washington now."

"And they're not all here anyway, we just have to not kill them, but get them to leave us alone," a tall blonde vampire with a calm demeanor says, and the room instantly is soothed. In fact, I start to feel quite rational, like we can figure this all out.

"Jasper, is that really necessary?" the blonde woman in the back snaps. She is quite possibly the most beautiful person I have ever seen in my life, hands down the most beautiful person in the room, even though she is currently looking at me as if she wants to chop my head off with a machete. Lovely.

"Sorry," the tall blonde one, evidently Jasper, says, and suddenly I feel just like I did before; slightly panicked.

All of a sudden this is too much and I begin to cry. I can't help it, this all begins to feel like too much. It probably looks like I'm faking it, but the thing is that I'm not, I just can't help it. Seth begins to pat my back, and Nessie tries to comfort me by touching me which isn't working when suddenly the vampire with caramel colored hair and a soft look around her comes between them and hugs her. "It's going to be okay, it's going to be okay," she croons to me and I only cry harder. Even though her skin is ice cold her embrace is strangely comforting and makes me want to stay there forever.

Seth looks extremely worried even though I'm just hugging her, and I want to ask him what the matter is, but I'm too busy getting hugged by a vampire.

"I'm Esme," she tells me as my tears are drying, and I'm wiping my eyes. Seth suddenly grabs me and pulls me close to his side. What's his deal. Esme seems hardly bothered by this, and she continues to point out who everyone is.

I suddenly know who Edward and Bella, who are Nessie's parents, Jasper and Alice, as well as Rosalie and Emmett are. "And this is Carlisle," she says of the shorter blonde man.

"Look, let's just figure out what we're going to do, okay. Then we can do something about this," Jacob's voice is filled with authority.

Everyone begins talking about things that we can do, and I decide it's best not to say anything at all. After all, this is all of my fault.

"And that's what we're going to do," Jacob says, and Seth nods and whisks me away before I can say anything to the vampires.

"What's your deal?" I ask him, rather roughly, I'll admit.

"I just don't want you to die, and hanging out with vampires has those kind of consequences."

"But they're _good _vampires, aren't they. That's what you told me, isn't it?"

"Look, I just don't want anything to happen to you. I love you."

"I love you too," I tell him, and hope to God everything turns out okay.

**A/N: I know. I'm so, so sorry. I suck. I suck so horribly. And I know it, so isn't that a good thing? I didn't think so. But hey, at least this story is getting somewhere! It won't be long now before this story is over and you can forgive me about this whole sordid affair. Hopefully the next update won't take so long, but it may. Sorry. :(**

**Love,**

**Dicey**


	27. Author's Note The End

**A/N:**

**This story is going to be deleted. Soon. I'm sorry for everyone that really liked this story, and everyone that wanted to see it end. But let's face it, it really is terribly written, has a poor plot, no subplot to speak of, and awful dialogue. I've just lost faith in it turning into something decent.**

**Unless you can think of a very good argument (like you should be running for president argument). I'll continue to write (always) I just won't be as active in the _Twilight_ universe as I have once been. I may post a few things here and there, just don't be waiting for it. **

**A spoiler for the end is at the bottom.**

**SPOILER!!!:**

**Also, if you want to know how it ends, the Volturi capture Sophie, Seth rescues her, and then The End. **

**I'll be deleting this soon. See you, possibly. **

**Endless Raindrops **


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